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141 " You never want to look in a mirror," Lula said. "Men love mirrors. They look at themselves doing the deed and they see Rex the Wonder Horse. Women look at themselves and think they need to renew their membership at the gym. "
― Janet Evanovich , Seven Up (Stephanie Plum, #7)
142 " Ranger Smiled. 'You want me to be Superman? Spend the night with me. "
― Janet Evanovich , Hot Six (Stephanie Plum, #6)
143 " I rolled my eyes so far into the top of my head I almost fell over backward. "
― Janet Evanovich , Three to Get Deadly (Stephanie Plum, #3)
144 " I buy wine according to the bottle design. After I get down the first glass it all tastes okay to me so I figure you go for something classy to look at on the table "
― Janet Evanovich , Smokin' Seventeen (Stephanie Plum, #17)
145 " And the closest I've come to an out-of-body experience was when Joe Morelli took his mouth to me fourteen years ago, behind the eclair case. "
― Janet Evanovich , One for the Money (Stephanie Plum, #1)
146 " I'd hate to list our specialties. Wreck cars, eat doughnuts, create mayhem. "
147 " Of course it's your fault," Grandma said. "You must be doing something wrong, if you know what I mean. Maybe you need to buy a book that tells you how to do it. I hear there are books out there with pictures and everything. I saw one in the store the other day. It was called A Sex Guide for Dummies. "
― Janet Evanovich , Eleven on Top (Stephanie Plum, #11)
148 " If anything happened to you, I'd be so destroyed they'd have to strap me to a bed and feed me through a tube. After five or six years, I might be capable of taking care of Rex. In the interim, you should assign a guardian. "
― Janet Evanovich , Fearless Fourteen (Stephanie Plum, #14)
149 " As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper. "
― Janet Evanovich , Hard Eight (Stephanie Plum, #8)
150 " A woman's never too old to make an idiot of herself. It goes along with equality of the sexes and potty parity. "
151 " I stuck my tongue out at him because I was feeling exceptionally mature. "
― Janet Evanovich , High Five (Stephanie Plum, #5)
152 " Ranger plays by his own set of rules, and I don't have a complete copy. "
― Janet Evanovich , Lean Mean Thirteen (Stephanie Plum, #13)
153 " Any intelligent woman would have made a dignified retreat, but this was New Jersey, where dignity always runs a poor second to the pleasure of getting in someone's face. "
― Janet Evanovich , Two for the Dough (Stephanie Plum, #2)
154 " I don't know if it's a good idea to give a woman a box of bullets when she's got a pimple. "
155 " they have enough testosterone between them, if testosterone were electricity they could light up New York City for the month of August "
― Janet Evanovich , Twelve Sharp (Stephanie Plum, #12)
156 " I'd slept with Ranger! Not sexually, of course. But I'd been in his bed. And then there was the evil shower gel. "It was all because of the shower gel," I said. Morelli's eyes narrowed. "Shower gel?" I made a major effort not to sigh. "Long story. You probably don't want to hear it. "
― Janet Evanovich , Ten Big Ones (Stephanie Plum, #10)
157 " A uniform cordoned off the area with crime scene tape. The M.E. pulled in and parked. There were two EMT trucks idling at the edge of the lot. I’d stayed close to the back door, and one of the Rangeman guys had taken a position two feet from me, standing at parade rest. No doubt in my mind he’d take a bullet for me rather than face Ranger over a dead Stephanie. "
158 " I was going to go to church, but I decided to get doughnuts instead. "
― Janet Evanovich , Four to Score (Stephanie Plum, #4)
159 " Maybe it was me," Grandma said."Sometimes they sneak out.Did I fart? "
― Janet Evanovich , To the Nines (Stephanie Plum, #9)
160 " If you buy chocolate with loose change the calories don’t count. "