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81 " In my opinion, kissing a lady's hand is a fine tradition. After all, a man must start somewhere. "
― Lois Greiman , One Hot Mess (A Chrissy McMullen Mystery, #5)
82 " Some people say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. In actuality, you have to make an incision through his skin, both dermis and epidermis, then carefully sever and separate the sternum. Only upon viewing the exposed thoracic cavity can you reach the heart--if indeed the male of the species actually possesses such an organ. "
83 " I don't need no PMS. I can bitch under my own steam. "
84 " Maybe money can't buy happiness, but it can get you a nice little villa in Tuscany, and that's close enough for me. "
85 " He's an undersized pissant with delusions of adequacy. "
86 " Jealousy. It's a terrible thing. Unless it's someone else's. "
87 " It'd hardly be worth having a brother at all, if you couldn't smack him in the head every once in a while. "
88 " It's not who you know, it's who you sleep with. "
89 " Some men are warriors and some men are weenies. The trick is figuring out which is which. "
― Lois Greiman , Unzipped (A Chrissy McMullen Mystery, #1)
90 " Today's problems are yesterday's mistakes coming back to bite you in the ass. "
91 " Maybe life does suck, Pork Chop, but it beats the hell out of the alternative. "
92 " Just when you think you have life by the tail, it's likely to whip around and take a hunk outta your balls. "
93 " There is no greater hell than realizing you're in love with the guy you hate. "
94 " You lose a couple of pounds and get a guy good and drunk, you could have a hell of a good time even if you are not smart. "
95 " Generally, men are superior in the areas of heavy lifting, where there's a past only by pachyderms and building cranes. Beyond that, I believe any right-thinking thinking will see that women have the indisputable advantage. "
96 " The theory of relativity doesn't amount to a hill of beans when there's a bonfire in your shorts. "
97 " Fair play is all well and good. But knowing how to kick 'em in the balls can get you out of a jam 9 times out of 10. "
98 " Just remember this, Missy, escargot ain't nothin' but snails with their noses stuck in the air. "
99 " Beauty is only skin deep, but who gives a shit what's under their skin anyway? "
100 " Chocolate may be cheaper than a psychiatrist, but the latter doesn't generally adhere to your ass for the rest of your natural life. "