Home > Author > Ambrose Bierce
61 " Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. "
― Ambrose Bierce
62 " Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious. "
63 " Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. "
64 " Experience - the wisdom that enables us to recognise in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced. "
65 " Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice. "
― Ambrose Bierce , The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary
66 " OBSOLETE, adj. No longer used by the timid. Said chiefly of words. A word which some lexicographer has marked obsolete is ever thereafter an object of dread and loathing to the fool writer, but if it is a good word and has no exact modern equivalent equally good, it is good enough for the good writer. Indeed, a writer's attitude toward "obsolete" words is as true a measure of his literary ability as anything except the character of his work. A dictionary of obsolete and obsolescent words would not only be singularly rich in strong and sweet parts of speech; it would add large possessions to the vocabulary of every competent writer who might not happen to be a competent reader. "
67 " Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly. "
68 " Patience, n. A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue "
69 " Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner, confessedly unworthy. "
70 " Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills. "
71 " Corporation, n. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility. "
72 " FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed. "
73 " Infidel, n. In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople, one who does. "
74 " Redemption, n. Deliverance of sinners from the penalty of their sin through their murder of the deity against whom they sinned. The doctrine of Redemption is the fundamental mystery of our holy religions, and whoso believeth in it shall not perish, but have everlasting life in which to try to understand it. "
75 " Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something he can see and feel. "
76 " All that day he travelled, laying his course by the rounding sun. The forest seemed interminable; nowhere did he discover a break in it, not even a woodman's road. He had not known that he lived in so wild a region. There was something uncanny in the revelation. "
― Ambrose Bierce , An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge
77 " Faith, n. Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel. "
78 " ANTAGONIST, n. The miserable scoundrel who won't let us. "
79 " HABIT, n. A shackle for the free. "
80 " Bore, n.: A person who talks when you wish him to listen. "