2
" Jonah lowered himself onto his backside and scooted against the wall. He kept his hand on the thick fur and petted the wolf that he’d seen on an almost daily basis for as long as he could remember. For the first time since that afternoon’s debacle with Zev, Jonah felt calm. He’d had trouble falling asleep, still anxious about Zev’s reaction to their encounter and Jonah’s assertion that Zev was attracted to him. Even when he’d finally drifted into slumber, Jonah had tossed around restlessly, terrified that he’d driven away his best friend for good. But in that moment, sitting on the floor with his arms around the brown wolf, he felt better. There was something about the animal that tempered Jonah’s worry and relaxed him from the inside out.
Jonah sighed. His eyelids felt heavy and his body was worn out from the stressful day. So much so, that with the wolf’s warm body pressed against his, Jonah succumbed to sleep without giving any thought as to why his cock had lengthened and hardened as soon as he’d embraced the creature. HE’D never rested so soundly, felt so complete and at peace. Jonah snuggled up against the soft, warm pillow and sighed happily. An answering rumble caused him to reassess the pillow theory. As sleep started clearing from his mind, Jonah became aware of the strong heartbeat close to his ear and the sound of someone else breathing.
Zev. He sensed Zev.
But the last time he’d seen his best friend they’d fought, so that didn’t make sense. Jonah opened one eye and was greeted with an amber gaze. Except these amber eyes weren’t attached to the body of the young man who’d played front and center in Jonah’s every fantasy. They were attached to the brown wolf Jonah had known even longer. His arm was already wrapped around the large canine, so Jonah just moved his hand back and forth over the soft coat, petting his animal friend.
“Morning, Pup. Anyone ever tell you that you make a great teddy bear?”
Jonah laughed when the wolf growled. He actually looked affronted. Who knew that expression was possible for a dog?
“Oh, Pup, did I offend you? Sorry, boy.” Jonah squeezed the large animal into a tight hug. It felt so comforting, he didn’t want to let go. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
9
" Without moving apart, Zev moaned and whispered into Jonah’s
mouth, “Damn, Blondie, you’re a great kisser.”
Jonah moved his arms up to Zev’s back, wrapping the young man
in his embrace and stroking his smooth, firm skin. “You’re not so bad
yourself, Hassick. You been practicing this with someone without me
knowing?”
Zev snickered. “You jealous?”
Jonah didn’t return the smile. He looked into Zev’s eyes and
answered without any guile, “Yeah. I’m jealous of anyone who got to
touch you.”
Instead of looking freaked out, as Jonah had half expected, Zev
remained completely calm. He gazed into Jonah’s eyes with such
powerful emotion that Jonah’s heart raced and his breath hitched.
“Unless you can manage being jealous of yourself, you don’t
have to worry. Like I told you yesterday, I haven’t ever thought about
anyone else—girls or guys—let alone touched anyone else. It’s just
you, Blondie. It’s always been you.” Zev let his words sink in, then he reversed the tables on the discussion. “What about you? Been hiding
out behind the bleachers sneaking kisses with cheerleaders?”
Jonah snorted more than laughed. “Uh, Zev, I was teasing about
the whole not-so-smart thing earlier, but now I’m thinking I may have
been on to something. That hardness you feel against your stomach
isn’t a banana. That’s me happy to see you, or feel you, in this case.
And you’re a guy. With that background in place, we can add two and
two together here and even someone with your limited math skills can
come up with the correct answer. I’m gay. I’ve got no deep dark
cheerleader secrets in my past.”
Zev was amazed at how easily Jonah said the words. He admired
how his friend so completely accepted this part of himself. No shame,
no hesitation. Just a matter-of-fact statement. In that moment, Zev
decided he’d take the same approach. He knew it’d shock his parents.
Hell, it’d rock his whole community. But he was attracted to a man. He
had a male mate. That meant he was gay. Zev Hassick was a gay
shifter. The pack would just have to find a way to deal with that truth
even though they’d always believed it to be impossible.
“And in case you’re wondering,” Jonah continued, his hand still
rubbing Zev’s back but now moving lower, skating over his ass, “I
don’t have any deep dark football player secrets, either. I’ve had a
crush on one guy for as long as I can remember and I kinda put all my
eggs in that basket.”
Zev took another kiss, slow, soft and sweet this time.
“I better be the egg-basket guy in that story, Blondie, or the
tickles are coming back in full force. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
10
" ZEV walked out of his parents’ house and over to his truck, dropped
his head against the door, and took in a deep breath, letting the fresh air
cool his lungs. Standing up to his family once again and garnering their
support for his future mating was all well and good, but none of it
meant a thing if his mate didn’t return and accept his place in the pack
beside Zev. If Jonah didn’t come home soon, Zev wasn’t sure whether
there’d be a Hassick male available to lead the Etzgadol pack.
He looked up at the sky. The stars were beautiful out here. They
sparkled above him, showing the spirits of those who came before.
Come back to me, Jonah. Our spirits are intertwined, and my body
cannot endure without its other half for much longer.
He felt the pain deep in his bones, the urge to shift and run. But
he pushed it back, grateful that, at least for now, his human could still
exert his will. His wolf was tired of waiting for his human to find their
mate and the wolf wanted control of their form so he could go find
Jonah and claim him. But their mate was long gone, well out of scent
distance, and the chance of Zev’s wolf finding him before running into
hunters or vehicles was slim.
Zev knew that unless he claimed his mate the time was fast
approaching when his human would no longer be able to control his
wolf. When that happened, the fear driving the intervention his family
had staged that night would become a reality: Zev’s human would be
forever lost. And without his human’s wisdom to limit him, Zev’s wolf
would likely end his life trying to find his mate. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
12
" Toby was in town visiting for a few days. Between all the time
the man had been spending with Lori, and with his own family, Zev
hadn’t gotten to see his friend much. But that evening Toby had shown
up with an extra-large pizza and a six-pack of beer.
They’d eaten some of the food, then shifted and gone out for a
long run. It had felt good to let his wolf free and feel the wind running
through his fur. So good, in fact, that Zev was almost smiling. A
foreign expression on his face these days.
“Look, Zev, I know you’d rather sit on my lap while I’m taking a
dump than talk about your feelings, but what’s going on with you?”
Zev coughed at the visual image that little comment had painted
in his mind. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he replied none
too convincingly. Then he flopped his head on the back of the couch
and draped his arm across his eyes. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
13
" Damn it, don’t you have any decent music in this house?
Be right back, I’m getting my iPod out of my truck.”
“I keep a loaded shotgun under this couch, Toby, and I’m
bringing it out if I hear Michael Bolton. And this isn’t a house. It’s a
small tin can.”
Toby grumbled. “Why the hate, dude? That man’s voice is
beautiful. I’m telling you, if he showed up at my door singing a ballad,
I’d give him anything he wanted without blinking an eye. My social
security number, where I keep the hidden house key, the secret ending
to The Crying Game, anything.”
“If I pretend to be deaf, will it get me out of a continued
discussion about whiny singers? And does my sister know about this
sick obsession of yours? ’Cause I imagine the best thing about your
taste in music is all the money you save on buying condoms.”
“Fine. But I don’t want to hear your head-banging crap, so no
music. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
14
" feet onto the file boxes serving as a coffee table and
smacked Zev in the stomach.
“Ow. Fuck, Toby, that hurt.”
“Yeah, right. Come on, Zev, I haven’t got all night. I need to go
home, shower, pretend to go to bed, then meet your sister outside your
parents’ house so I can corrupt her. And I’m not gonna get very far
with her if she isn’t convinced that I got you to open up, so spill.”
Zev winced. “There are so many things wrong with that sentence
that I can’t even prioritize. Can you please pass me the brain bleach?”
“Okay, fine. Lori and I are going to play chess and braid each
other’s hair all night. Is that what you want to hear? "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
15
" When Zev still didn’t say anything, Toby visibly stiffened,
seemingly steeling his courage, and then continued speaking. “Is
something going on with Jonah?”
“We haven’t talked about Jonah since he moved away,” Zev
answered after a short pause.
“I know.”
“That was three and a half years ago,” Zev continued.
“I know.”
He probably should have been surprised that Toby had known
he’d kept in touch with Jonah, but Zev wasn’t. Lori was pretty
perceptive, and she probably knew exactly where Zev went when he
traveled for business. And what Lori knew, Toby knew. Whether they
were aware of the nature of Zev’s feelings for the human wasn’t clear,
but Zev was too tired to try to make excuses.
“He’s gonna go to medical school.” Zev still hadn’t moved his arm from his face, so he couldn’t see Toby’s reaction.
“Medical school?” Toby’s voice was tempered but confused.
“That’s, like, four years of school and then four years of
residency. Which means eight more years away from Etzgadol.” Eight
more years away from me.
The last part was really the crux of the problem, but Zev didn’t
dare say it out loud. It’d give away too much. Still, it didn’t make
sense. A few years away so they could grow up and be old enough to
tie when they came back together, Zev was almost able to understand.
But that time had passed, Zev had figured out how to tie with a male,
and he was ready for his mate to join him.
Why would nature give him a mate who insisted on staying
away? Zev felt like he was missing something. Like there was a lesson
he should be learning, but he had no clue what it was. Instead, he just
felt frustrated and angry. So many thoughts were swirling in his mind
that he hadn’t registered Toby’s long silence until the other man spoke
again.
“You know my mom works with Doc Carson.”
The change in topic was weird, but welcome, so Zev engaged
Toby in the conversation.
“Yeah, I know.”
“So I was asking her the other day if she thinks he’d take me on at
the clinic when I get my nursing degree, and you know what she told
me?”
The conversation was about as interesting as watching paint peel,
but at least it got Zev thinking about something other than Jonah.
Almost. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
16
" Zev’s heart thumped wildly, and he somehow managed to
increase his speed, running faster than he’d ever previously managed.
Jonah was a big kid, almost as big as Zev. And he was strong. But
shifters were stronger than humans, even when wearing their human
skins. And with three of them surrounding Jonah, he didn’t stand a
chance. Hell, even very few shifters would manage to come out
victorious against those odds.
The sounds of fists hitting bodies intermingled with shouting
ratcheted Zev’s anxiety even higher. Just as he was about to turn the
corner, the noise stopped. That unexpected silence increased the fear
that racked Zev’s body to such high proportions that he thought he
might vomit.
“Get away from….”
Zev’s warning stuck in his throat as he finally managed to get
around the edge of the building to survey the scene in front of him.
Brian was lying on the ground, cradling his arm. A shifter who was two
years older than Zev was flat on his back with his eyes closed. The
third shifter who’d threatened Jonah was holding his nose, trying to
block the blood that poured out from between his fingers. And in the
center of the damage stood Jonah, his fists clenched, face sweaty, blond
hair disheveled, and expression fierce. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
19
" The internal conflict kept Jonah paralyzed in place. That is, until
Pup walked over to him and rested his head on Jonah’s lap. Amber eyes
looked up at him with the same loving, devoted gaze that had met him
earlier that morning, except this time those eyes were in a different
face. Everything that had been holding Jonah back was dismissed with
that recognition.
This was his Zev, the man who meant everything to him. Okay,
so what he’d just witnessed with his own eyes didn’t make sense, but,
hey, neither did physics at the beginning of the semester freshman year,
and by the end, Jonah had earned an A. So he’d just need to learn about
this in the same way, ask questions, study… whatever there was to
study. Jonah was a good student; learning had never been an issue for
him. Jonah took in a deep breath. Yes, this was all about learning
something new. It’d be fine. "
― Cardeno C. , Wake Me Up Inside (Mates, #1)
