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" I don’t know about this,” I whisper, pressing up against one of the cups, “it feels so wrong.” “It’s so right, though,” he tells me. Suddenly, my homosexual attraction is just too much to bear. Overwhelmed with lust, I drop down to my knees between them and gaze up with an erotic fire in my eyes. “Come on,” I beg, “I want you guys to show me what the holiday spirit is all about! "
― Chuck Tingle , Oppressed In The Butt By My Inclusive Holiday Coffee Cups