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" Look you can do whatever you want. Despite what Harper says tonight, she loves you enough that she would never actually stop you from doing something you wanted to do. But your girl wasn’t the only one who thought you were gone. It was like a complete flash back of that night for all of us. People normally wake up from smelling salts, you didn’t. You didn’t even move.” “I didn’t know they used them.” “Well they did, three different times. She has every right to be terrified that she’s going to lose you like she lost Chase. Only this time, I don’t know if she would be able to move on. I understand that you didn’t see her side of things after you broke up, but we did. Everyone knew she was still madly in love with you, even Chase knew it but he never brought it up. We all knew he would never hold her heart the way you did. But you did see her the morning before he died, and you saw what that, and his death did to her.” “It was like she wasn’t even there anymore.” Brandon whispered. “Exactly. I had to watch two police officers hold her down and she still escaped them to get to Chase. I watched her scream for him to wake up even though she knew he wouldn’t. But tonight? Random guys standing near us even helped in trying to keep her away from the ring. She got away from four grown men tonight. Four! And she’s about to have a baby. The fear in her eyes and voice, was like nothing I’ve ever seen before. It was as if her reason for existing was lying motionless on the floor. Losing you would kill her, I have no doubt about that. So do what you want, but consider her and your baby before you go out there again.” “I "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" The next thing I knew, my heavy eyelids slowly opened when Brandon lowered me to my bed. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, my voice raspy from the short nap, “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” He smiled and tucked a loose chunk of hair behind my ear, “Don’t worry about it, you were tired.” “Mhmm. I had a great time though, thanks for taking me.” “Anytime, get some sleep.” He leaned over and kissed my forehead softly once. As soon as his lips touched me, my gummy bear woke up. I laughed once, “I don’t think that will be happening, he’s been asleep until now, he’ll start kicking soon and won’t stop for the next few hours.” Brandon slid onto the bed and put his hands under my shirt, resting them on my stomach. I sucked in a quick gasp but didn’t say anything. We’d already gone way past our friend-only-touching-zone when he’d held me and I kissed him on the cheek this morning. He may talk to my gummy bear every day, but when his hands were on me, they were always over my shirt. Not now though. Now, I was lying in bed, he had his hands on my bare stomach, gently caressing it, and was looking at me from under thick black eyelashes. All I could think about was kissing him. My baby was going crazy, moving his legs and arms back and forth, and Brandon looked so happy I closed my eyes and pictured a world where this could be okay. A world where Brandon and I had stayed together, eventually gotten married and were now expecting. After what must have been at the very least ten minutes later, Brandon leaned forward, his deep voice husky and hypnotic, “Be good to your mom little man, she needs to sleep.” and then he kissed my stomach. So soft, so tender, I couldn’t be sure if I’d imagined it. Then he straightened and came closer to me, “Good night, I’ll see you tomorrow sweetheart.” I "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" I’m not going anywhere. I promised you forever, didn’t I?” “Forever.” I agreed. “Come here,” He scooted to the far right side of the bed and rolled onto his left side, “you’re still on bedrest, and I haven’t been taking care of you tonight.” I lay down on my back and sighed at having Brandon’s warm body pressed against mine and finally relaxing. Dr. Lowdry may have a point to this whole bedrest thing, my entire body had been aching to lay down. Brandon kissed me softly and placed a hand on my belly. “Are you two doing okay? Physically?” “Yeah, he went to sleep right before I came in here the first time.” “Good, I want you to sleep too. I’ll wake you up when we’re going to go home.” I couldn’t even protest, it had been a long day anyway, and what happened tonight had exhausted me to the point where I thought I could fall asleep standing. I felt Brandon’s lips on my forehead and heard his whispers of his love for me, but I was out before I could respond. "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
124
" Can’t you just leave me alone?” I groaned and rolled over to face him. “Once again Princess, you’re in my room.” “Fine, then I’ll go.” I tried to make my way around him but he planted his hands on my shoulders holding me in place. “Chase let me go!” “Not until you talk to me.” I couldn’t even throw my hands out in exasperation, “We have nothing to talk about!” “I’m sorry I hurt you but I was just so damn mad!” “Do you know how immature you sound right now? You decided to hurt me because you were mad?! What did I ever do to you Chase? And why do I always end up with your hands on me? Let. Me. Go.” “Because you won’t stop and talk to me for five minutes!” “Then you should understand that I don’t want to talk to you.” He still didn’t let me go, “Answer me! What did I do to make you mad?” His face was suddenly directly in front of mine and he gripped even harder, making me gasp from the sudden pain; it felt like his thumbs were digging into the sockets. “Nothing! You did nothing, I’m not mad at you!” The scent of vodka was pouring out of his mouth, I’m pretty sure I could get drunk just from his breath. “Seriously, you’re hurting me! Get off me and leave me alone!” I didn’t feel threatened yet, but I instinctively went through different moves I’d been taught in case I started to. The door swung open and Brandon rushed in, followed closely by Bree and a few others. “What the hell, Chase?!” He roared and stomped towards us. Brandon’s fist connected with Chase’s face seconds after his hands left me. I shrieked and jumped back as he fell to the ground. “Keep your hands off her!” Brandon took a step towards me and pulled me close, cupping my face in his hands. “Was he hurting you?” I just stared at him and put a hand over his reassuringly. I didn’t need a guy coming to my rescue, but damn if Brandon punching him hadn’t just turned me on. “Come on, let’s get you out of this room.” He led me towards the door, stopping at Bree. “Bree I’m sorry –” She held up a hand to stop him, “Don’t. He deserved that one.” She smiled at us before glaring at her brother, still on the floor. Brandon must’ve hit him hard. “Can you make sure Harper has a bed to sleep in tonight? I don’t want him near her.” “Of course.” “And keep your hands to yourself.” She said sternly, complete with a raised eyebrow. “Yes ma’am.” He squeezed me gently once before pulling me through the crowd gathered in the doorway and hall. Once we were in his dark room he turned to face me and cupped my cheeks once again. “Are you okay?” “Yeah, I’m fine. He wasn’t doing anything other than trying to talk to me.” “He doesn’t need to force you to speak with him, or to stay in the room with him. He should have let you go the first time you asked him.” “The first time?” He sighed, “We heard everything Harper.” I groaned and let my head sink into his chest, silently thanking the dark for hiding my blush, “Awesome. I’m starting to think I’m just not meant to come to this house.” “Maybe "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" I know you think you can’t, but you can move on in that area of your life too. In fact, you should. Chase wouldn’t want you to raise the baby and live your life alone.” “I won’t be alone,” I countered, “I’ll have you guys.” “You will have us, always, but don’t shut love out of your life. Chase would want you to have a husband, he would want the baby to have a father.” She wiped a tear from her cheek. “But isn’t this too soon? I’m so confused, it’s like when I was fighting my feelings for Chase when I was dating Brandon, only now I feel like I’m acting as if Chase didn’t matter to me by even considering anything with Brandon.” “For a lot of people, two months is too soon. But your situation is entirely different because of what happened between the three of you before. So that doesn’t exactly apply to you and Brandon now. If you’re worried about us Harper, don’t. We all want for you to be happy, and we agree Brandon makes you happy. We wouldn’t have called him to help you out of your mourning if we were afraid you would eventually go back to him. “If you want to do this on your own, then you should. But, if you want to be with him, don’t miss your chance with him again. He’s good for you, and though he has every right to be bitter about your baby, he already loves him more than we could ever hope a man in your life would.” She paused for a minute and leaned back in her chair, “I know what Chase thought of him, and I promise he would be happy with your choice. He knew Brandon could take care of, and love you, better than anyone. That’s why he didn’t interfere with your relationship for so long.” We sat in silence a few minutes while I let that sink in. It’s like she knew exactly what I needed to hear, to know the family wouldn’t judge me, and most importantly, for someone to tell me Chase would want me to be happy and move on too. Claire leaned over and hugged me tight before speaking again, “I think the real question is, how did you feel after you kissed him?” “Like I could finally breathe again.” I answered honestly. “I still love him Mom.” “I know you do, sweetie.” “Is "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" I was stupid.” His voice was soft but rougher than usual, “So stupid. I missed fighting, and hated that people thought I stopped because I was scared. When he called –” his eyes briefly left mine as he tried to search for words, “it was like what happened last year was nothing, just another minor injury. I felt like I needed to prove something to myself, to Scarecrow, to Demon … everyone. I knew leaving was about the worst thing I could do, and I knew you would hate me when I got home, but I couldn’t stop. I had to go, I had to fight. “I felt sick as soon as the fight was over, I knew I’d fucked up. I should have felt that the minute you stepped away from me when you realized what was happening, but I’d been too wrapped up in it all to even absorb what you were saying to me until it was done. I got here as fast as possible, ready to get on my knees and beg you to forgive me for doing that to you … it never occurred to me you’d be gone.” The pain in his eyes was tearing at me and he had to take a few deep breaths before continuing, “We tried calling you dozens of times, Jeremy went to Mom’s house to look for you, the rest of us went to Robert and Claire’s. Claire lost it when she realized she’d let both of you just leave. No one had any idea where you would have gone. God Harper, I thought I’d never see you or Liam again. You, Liam and the baby are my world. I don’t know how to live without you. I know I messed up, I know I hurt you, but please don’t do that to me again. I love you more than my own life Harper. I’m so sorry for hurting you.” I "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" Why are you treating me like this? What did I do?” “Nothing!” “So this is what you do then? You make girls feel like they’re special for a few days, then treat them like they’re nothing?” He turned on me right before he got to his room, “You’re really gonna put this on me? One minute you’re kissing me, the next you’re talking to your boyfriend and telling him you love him!” “What did you want me to do, not answer it?” “It doesn’t even matter Harper,” He laughed humorlessly, “drop it.” “It does to me! I’m so tired of this roller coaster with you. I never know which Chase I’m going to meet up with that day. Is it going to be the cold or the funny and caring Chase? Will it be the one that’s with four girls in one night, or the one that tells me how beautiful I am, does amazingly sweet things for me and notices stuff about me that no one else does?” Okay so Brandon noticed, but that wouldn’t help my argument right now. He just continued to glare at me. “You’re all over the place, I don’t know how to act around you, I don’t know what you want!” “I want you! All I’ve ever wanted is you.” “Then why are you trying to hurt me again?” “Because it’s easier that way.” His voice was soft now, and I could see the pain in his eyes, “You’re with Brandon. Do you know what it’s like watching you with him? Wanting you so bad, but knowing he’s who you should be with?” “But what if I want you?” “Harper, don’t.” “I’m so in love with Brandon, but I can’t help what I feel for you, and I know you know what I’m talking about. Whatever this is between us … it’s been there since we met. It’s like I can’t get enough of you, but all you do is push me away. It’s all you’ve ever done!” “Because I’m not what you need Harper!” I stepped closer towards him, “Then why did you kiss me Chase? You knew it would change everything, and it did. So tell me, why did you do it?” He ran a hand through his hair and blew out a frustrated breath, “I needed to.” He closed the distance between us, “You’re all I can think about and it drives me crazy! I would have given anything for that kiss, and I knew I wouldn’t get that chance again, so I had to. I had to know if you felt something too.” I threw out my hands in exasperation, “Was that not obvious? Is it not obvious that I’m in love with you?” His "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" Hey Harper, where were you last night?” I turned to see him sitting on the kitchen counter, coffee mug in hand. My heart dropped when I looked into his gray eyes. I wanted to curl up in his arms and take back the last five months. “Uh, thought it’d be a little awkward considering.” I waved a hand over my stomach. “Oh, yeah.” His eyes stayed glued to my small round belly, “Yeah, I guess. How is that going?” “It’s good.” I said softly, watching his face carefully while I said the next words, “It’s going to be a boy.” One of the days when we were in Arizona for Christmas, I had been in the kitchen with his mom cooking barefoot. Brandon started teasing that all I needed now was to be pregnant, and it would be a perfect picture. I had thrown an oven mitt at him, which he dodged and brought back over to me, wrapping his arms around me and kissing my neck. He promised he’d been joking but said whenever we did have kids, he wanted a boy to name him after his dad. I hadn’t been ready to talk about marriage with him at that point, but in the joyful mood of that day I had laughed and promised to pop out a boy for him ASAP. Even through the laughing, he got a wide smile and his eyes sparkled. My heart squeezed at that memory. He blew out heavily and closed his eyes, probably remembering that day too. “That’s uh, that’s great Harper. I’m happy for you.” My "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" Harper kissed Brandon last night.” Mom was leaning over the table like she was sharing some seriously juicy gossip. “Well it’s about damn time!” Bree said faking a little exasperation. I looked at her stunned, “How can you even say that? It’s only been two months Bree.” Her face fell to a sympathetic smile, “I know, but you’re only holding back because you’re afraid of letting go of Chase’s memory. Tell me friend, has anything changed in your heart? If Brandon asked you right now to marry him, what would you say?” Yes. I didn’t even have to think about that or answer it for that matter, “But Bree –” “Allowing yourself to be with Brandon isn’t a bad thing. It’s also not discarding what you had with Chase, and it’s what he would want for you. We all do.” That’s exactly what Mom had been saying, I looked between the three of them, my eyes narrowing. “Have you guys been talking about this? Why am I just finding this all out?” “Because you needed the time to heal enough to the point where you would know if you wanted to be with Brandon or not. We didn’t want to push you either way by saying it was okay too early.” Mom said simply. “Sweetie, honestly, if you want to be with him you should. Don’t let anything stop you from loving him and letting him love you and your baby.” “But "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" I mean – I don’t know. This whole thing is just so weird and confusing. I already,” I looked at them quickly, my cheeks heating with shame, “um, I already think about him playing Dad for Gummy Bear. He’s so sweet with him and I find myself thinking how good of a father he would be. I’m afraid if I were to be with him again, I would just assume he would want to play that part and that isn’t fair to Brandon. Or what if he didn’t want that role at all? I can’t pressure him into even having to make that kind of a decision.” “Kid,” Konrad snorted, “I’m sorry, but really? You really think all that?” “No. But I feel like I’m taking advantage of him or something.” “Okay, it’s painfully obvious to us that he would be there for you and GB in a heartbeat. But hearing you say that, it’s just so frustrating knowing that you two are doing this to each other. You sound just like Brandon.” “What do you mean?” “I love you Kid, but God you’re so dense sometimes. He freaking loves you. And I know you know that. But he’s terrified that he’s going to push you away with his feelings for you and GB. It doesn’t help that you keep telling him you guys can’t be together.” He momentarily took a hand off Bree’s thigh to stop me when my mouth opened, “I know why you say that, and he gets it too. But all of us are just waiting for the day when you guys finally acknowledge the fact that you can’t live without each other. So you’re sitting here telling us you’re afraid of pushing him into something you think he might not want to go into, or you think he shouldn’t have to. And when we go work out or surf, all he can talk about is wanting to take care of you and GB for the rest of your lives, but he’s worried that if he says anything you’ll shut him out for good. You know he told me he’d rather be your friend for the rest of his life than risk not being able to make sure you guys are happy and okay?” “Oh Brandon.” I whispered. “God I’ve been so selfish, he needs to go live his life. I need to make him leave.” “No, you’ve been stupid. I’m sorry,” his hands went back in surrender as he looked at Mom, “but someone needs to say it to her. Harper,” he waited until I was looking in his eyes, “you love him, and you want to be with him. He loves you and GB and would give anything to be with you. So stop fighting it, this is like ten times worse than you not telling Chase you were pregnant. And yeah, I knew then too.” Bree, Mom and I all stared at him in shock, “I was with you and Bree all the time, it was obvious right away what was going on.” There "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
132
" You’re all I can think about and it drives me crazy! I would have given anything for that kiss, and I knew I wouldn’t get that chance again, so I had to. I had to know if you felt something too.” I threw out my hands in exasperation, “Was that not obvious? Is it not obvious that I’m in love with you?” His mouth was on mine then and my surprised gasp turned into a moan. He wrapped my legs around his waist and pushed me into the wall, his lips moving fiercely against mine. “Say it again.” His breaths were coming hard and fast as he kissed me again. “Chase,” I grasped his face so he would look at me, “I love you.” A huge smile spread across his face before I pressed my lips to his, “God Harper I love you too, so much. "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" Okay, it’s painfully obvious to us that he would be there for you and GB in a heartbeat. But hearing you say that, it’s just so frustrating knowing that you two are doing this to each other. You sound just like Brandon.” “What do you mean?” “I love you Kid, but God you’re so dense sometimes. He freaking loves you. And I know you know that. But he’s terrified that he’s going to push you away with his feelings for you and GB. It doesn’t help that you keep telling him you guys can’t be together.” He momentarily took a hand off Bree’s thigh to stop me when my mouth opened, “I know why you say that, and he gets it too. But all of us are just waiting for the day when you guys finally acknowledge the fact that you can’t live without each other. So you’re sitting here telling us you’re afraid of pushing him into something you think he might not want to go into, or you think he shouldn’t have to. And when we go work out or surf, all he can talk about is wanting to take care of you and GB for the rest of your lives, but he’s worried that if he says anything you’ll shut him out for good. You know he told me he’d rather be your friend for the rest of his life than risk not being able to make sure you guys are happy and okay?” “Oh Brandon.” I whispered. “God I’ve been so selfish, he needs to go live his life. I need to make him leave.” “No, you’ve been stupid. I’m sorry,” his hands went back in surrender as he looked at Mom, “but someone needs to say it to her. Harper,” he waited until I was looking in his eyes, “you love him, and you want to be with him. He loves you and GB and would give anything to be with you. So stop fighting it, this is like ten times worse than you not telling Chase you were pregnant. And yeah, I knew then too.” Bree, Mom and I all stared at him in shock, “I was with you and Bree all the time, it was obvious right away what was going on.” There "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" BRANDON!” I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around me, “Brandon!” He came bursting through the door less than a second later, “What’s wrong?!” His eyes were wide and panicked. “Are you okay?” I laughed and nodded, “My water just broke!” “Are you serious?” His face fell for a few beats then broke out into a wide grin. Closing the distance between us he kissed me until my knees were weak. When he pulled back, he cupped my cheeks tenderly and smiled. “So he’s coming?” “Guess so, you ready for this?” Brandon suddenly gasped, “Wait, we have to go! That means we have to go!” He turned around and took off into the bedroom. By the time I dried myself off, I could hear him on the phone with either my family or his. I felt strangely calm as I pulled on the dark blue shirt, and searched around for a clean pair of sweats. Brandon rushed out of the room with the hospital bag, I heard the front door open, close, open and close again before he came running back to me. I was sitting on the bed smiling at his behavior. “Harper, we have to go. Come on sweetheart, is there anything else you can think of?” “Phone chargers.” I watched as he yanked both ours from the wall. “Headphones, can you grab me one of your sweatshirts?” I didn’t care if it was September, the nights were cool, and when we’d been in that hospital last week, it was freezing. “What else?” “I need you to kiss me, then calm down and drive us to the hospital. "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
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" Oh, Carter. What am I going to do with you?” “Love me?” “Uh … no.” I laughed at his playfully hurt expression, “Nice try though.” When our laughter quieted, I said in a soft voice, “He really is amazing Carter.” “I know.” The corner of his mouth tilted up in a sad smile, “I wish it were me Blaze. I’ll always wish it was me instead of him. But I know he’s good for you and your baby.” “Babies.” “What? You’re pregnant again?” His face was pained through his smile for me, “Well damn. I guess I really don’t have a shot with you now.” I knew he was joking, but I stayed serious, “You need to find someone who is good for you too. I know she’s out there somewhere.” “But all I see is you. For the last three years, all I’ve seen was you Blaze.” “You have to stop. You need to know that it’s never going to happen between us, and start living your life for you. And not a life where you wait for something to separate Brandon and me, because that will never happen. Get out there, date some girls, and find the one that was meant for you. I do love you Carter, but it’s never been the way you want it. So find someone that you love, and loves you the way Brandon and I love each other.” “Maybe one day I will.” He said doubtfully. “I hope you do.” I yawned and got off the couch, wrapping the blanket tighter around me, “Now get out of my house so I can go back to sleep with my husband or I’ll kick your ass.” “Puh-lease. Preggos aren’t supposed to kick ass. Isn’t it bad for the baby or something?” “Well fine, then I’ll let Brandon do it.” “Alright, "
― Molly McAdams , Taking Chances (Taking Chances, #1)
