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1 " Be yourself. Unless you can be a unicorn, In that case, you should always be a unicorn. "
― Elle Lothlorien , Alice in Wonderland
2 " You can donate marrow for her, Alice Faye, you can’t cure her. You can win a poker tournament, but that won’t make her want to live. So I’ll ask you again: Who are you, and what are you doing here? Because Munny sure doesn’t want you to be her, and she wants someone to be out in the world living since she’s got the market cornered on dying right now. "
3 " I slump in my chair, thinking how a narcotic party of one is no party at all. "
4 " Aw, you’re nothing but heart, Mako. Nice valentine in your skull, by the way. Is that temporary or did the Tanaka-kai change their daimon to attract the Powerpuff Girls crowd? "
5 " If you ever pull a switcheroo like that again, Dee, I’m going to offer your boyfriend ten thousand dollars to make out with Alice for two minutes. "
6 " I think it would be prudent to advise you that due to extraordinary circumstances beyond our control, the original plan we had for participating in and extending the duration of the IPT Main Event has been drastically altered, specifically as it pertains to certain individuals competing— "
7 " I want to kiss my brother for being so tactful. Rabbit looks grateful as well, and I can only imagine what it would be like to trot out your embarrassing 'enjo kosai' problem in front of your sister, your former love-interest of a couple of weeks, and her two siblings. "
8 " Souris says you wanted to see me, so here I am. Talk quick before I decide to beat the shit out of you and throw your bloody carcass back across the International Date Line. "
9 " As you know, the International Poker Tour, by its own admission, knows very little about poker games, one of which ended tragically last week when an IPT-sanctioned tournament aboard a yacht in Australia accidentally used tarot cards instead of playing cards. That’s right, it’s true! Apparently no one noticed until someone laid down a full house and the dealer died. "
10 " Faye, if you got eaten by another shark, would you please at least have the decency to say so? My time is kind of limited, if you know what I’m sayin’. "
11 " Well, you played me, Rabbit. You played me, and it worked, and I’m not the kind of person to make the same mistake twice. Your whole life is a game, but you know what? I already have a life. Poker’s nothing to me but a goddamn deck of cards. "
12 " Turns out making a dramatic exit is a lot harder when you have to stand there and wait another twenty minutes for a boat to dock. "
13 " Enjoy your little run because there’s no way you get off this boat without her trying to slice your Achilles in half. "
14 " And just so you know—that winter forest we walked into first? That was from Through the Looking Glass too. Hey, if you’re going to saddle me with the blame for your overconsumption, at least get the book right. "
15 " Wait, and you had to ask him if Faye’s in danger? IF? Okay, first of all, I’m just going to admit that I didn’t know Japan had a Mafia, but I also didn’t know they got a Disney World. If someone gets an invitation from the Mafia, I’d say there’s potential for a bit of danger, wouldn’t you? I mean, am I the only one here who saw Goodfellas? "
16 " Right, 'the Queen of Hearts.' Sounds to me like you’re just one bitch in a whole pack of cards, baby. "
17 " The words ‘drink me’ come to mind. Anyone besides me up for some heavy alcohol consumption? "
18 " Oh, Alice, you haven’t even had a taste of my romantic streak yet. And when the time’s right I don’t think I’ll have to ‘try’ to have my way with you. I just WILL. "
19 " My help—it’s not a light switch you can turn on and off. My help starts right now, and after this point you don’t get to tell me that you don’t want it anymore. Understand? You had a chance to walk away, Alice, and you didn’t take it. Now it’s time to play the game. "
20 " Have you thrown ‘Why is a raven like a writing desk?’ at her yet? "