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Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7) QUOTES

Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7) QUOTES

1 " You know how you heal really fast?” I stood and walked to the doorway that separated our offices. “Yes,” I answered, wondering where she was going with this. She was sucking the side of her index finger. “Maybe if you lick my cut, your spit will heal me fast, too.” “Dude,” I said, tamping down a giggle, “I’m not licking your cut.” “Just lick me.” She held out her finger. “This is going to be tender for days.” “I’m not licking you.” A line I rarely said aloud. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

2 " I was busy perusing the suicide notes and waiting for Belvedere's water to finish its treatment when I heard a thud from Cookie's office. Then a mousy squeak. The a throaty moan.

"Cookie," I said, wiggling my fingers at Belvedere to get him acquainted to with our strange ways, "are you masturbating?"

"No, I got a paper cut."

Oh, I didn't see that coming. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

3 " Okay but he has a case for you," she said again, her voice singsong.

"Don't care."

"It's right up your alley. There's been a rash of suicide notes."

"That's not right up my alley. That's, like, two blocks over from my alley. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

4 " Did you look at the memo?”
“What memo? We’re getting memos now?”
“I sent a memo a week ago. I’ve been sending you a memo every week with a list of all the updates and my notes on all our cases for weeks now.”
Holy cow. Missed the boat on that one. “Oh, those memos. I totally knew that.”
“You’re not even reading them, are you?”
“I thought they were optional.”
Note to self: Stop making paper airplanes out of Cookie’s memos. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

5 " Agent Carson pulled up in her SUV. We'd thrown her when we both climbed into her official vehicle, but I quickly explained that Reyes, my affianced, had separation anxiety. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

6 " I don’t think I get enough credit for the fact that I do all of this unmedicated. —T-SHIRT "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

7 " I’m like crack. People don’t want to like me, but once they get a taste, they always come back for more. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

8 " You’re the reason I get up in the morning.
That, and I need to pee. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

9 " The horror that riveted through me, the absolute terror with a taint of nausea, stunned me speechless for three, maybe four seconds. I put the mug down and made a cross with my fingers, screaming, "Death before decaf!" as Garrett poured himself a cup. The fool. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

10 " I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

11 " If I’m upset, hold me and tell me how beautiful I am.

If I growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate.

— BEST. ADVICE. EVER. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

12 " Of course I’m an organ donor. Who wouldn’t want a piece of this? —T-SHIRT "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

13 " Lead me not into temptation. Follow me instead! I know a shortcut! —T-SHIRT "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

14 " I knew it!” she said, glaring at me. “You’re in league with the devil.” “Duh. I’m affianced to him. Or, well, his son. I guess that makes me ‘in league’ with him, but you can’t judge people by their in-laws. In-laws are all crazy. Everyone knows that. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

15 " A wine, please.” “Ma’am, this is McDonald’s.” “Okay, a McWine, please.” —MCDONALD’S DRIVE-THROUGH, 2 A.M. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

16 " I thought you were mad at me.” “I am.” “Well, I make it a rule never to have sex with anyone who’s mad at me.” He arched a brow. “It’s a wonder you’ve ever had sex at all. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

17 " Charley Davidson, Private Investigator, Because No One Is Better At Investigating Your Privates "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

18 " My life is just like a soap opera filmed in a psychiatric ward. —T-SHIRT "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

19 " Most of what I call “cooking” is just melting cheese on stuff. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)

20 " You are the worst greeter in the history of greeters ever. In the history. Of time. And greeters.” “Greeter? You think I’m a greeter?” Talk about a demotion. “Yes. To the other side?” She pointed up. “Dude, calling me a greeter is like calling Saint Peter a ticket taker. "

― Darynda Jones , Seventh Grave and No Body (Charley Davidson, #7)