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" Questions to ask yourself We find it's not very useful to tell you what you should do. It's far more effective to pose questions when you're contemplating a course of action. We will do this throughout the book. To start with, here are some questions that can help you determine whether polyamory might be a good match for you: Have I ever felt romantic love for more than one person at the same time? Do I feel there can be only one "true" love or one "real" soulmate? How important is my desire for multiple romantic relationships? What do I want from my romantic life? Am I open to multiple sexual relationships, romantic relationships, or both? If I want more than one lover, what degree of closeness and intimacy do I expect, and what do I offer? How important is transparency to me? If I have more than one lover, am I happy with them knowing about each other? If they have other lovers, am I happy knowing them? How do I define commitment? Is it possible for me to commit to more than one person at a time, and if so, what would those commitments look like? If I am already in a relationship, does my desire for others come from dissatisfaction or unhappiness with my current relationship? If I were in a relationship that met my needs, would I still want multiple partners? "
― Franklin Veaux , More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory