1
" There are moments in every relationship that define when two people start to fall in love.
A first glance
A first smile
A first kiss
A first fall…
(I remove the Darth Vader house shoes from my satchel and look down at them.)
You were wearing these during one of those moments.
One of the moments I first started to fall in love with you.
The way you gave me butterflies that morning
Had absolutely nothing to do with anyone else,
and everything to do with you.
I was falling in love with you that morning
because of you.
(I take the next item out of the satchel. When I pull it out and look up, she brings her hands to her mouth in shock.)
This ugly little gnome
With his smug little grin…
He's the reason I had an excuse to invite you into my house.
Into my life.
You took a lot of aggression out on him over those next few months.
I would watch from my window as you would kick him over every time you walked by him.
Poor little guy.
You were so tenacious.
That feisty, aggressive, strong-willed side of you….
The side of you that refused to take crap from this concrete gnome?
The side of you that refused to take crap from me?
I fell in love with that side of you
because of you.
(I set the gnome down on the stage and grab the CD)
This is your favorite CD
‘Layken’s shit.’
Although now I know you intended for shit to be possessive, rather than descriptive.
The banjo started playing through the speakers of your car
and I immediately recognized my favorite band.
Then when I realized it was your favorite band, too?
The fact that these same lyrics inspired both of us?
I fell in love with that about you.
That had absolutely nothing to do with anyone else.
I fell in love with that about you
because of you.
(I take a slip of paper out of the satchel and hold it up. When I look at her, I see Eddie slide her a napkin. I can’t tell from up here, but that can only mean she’s crying.)
This is a receipt I kept.
Only because the item I purchased that night was on the verge of ridiculous.
Chocolate milk on the rocks? Who orders that?
You were different, and you didn’t care.
You were being you.
A piece of me fell in love with you at that moment,
because of you.
This? (I hold up another sheet of paper.)
This I didn’t really like so much.
It’s the poem you wrote about me.
The one you titled 'mean?'
I don’t think I ever told you…
but you made a zero.
And then I kept it
to remind myself of all the things I never want to be to you.
(I pull her shirt from my bag. When I hold it into the light, I sigh into the microphone.)
This is that ugly shirt you wear.
It doesn’t really have anything to do with why I fell in love with you.
I just saw it at your house and thought I’d steal it. "
― Colleen Hoover , Point of Retreat (Slammed, #2)
10
" (I pull the second to last item out of my bag. Her purple hair clip. She told me once how much it meant to her, and why she always keeps it.)
This purple hair clip?
It really is magic…just like your dad told you it was.
It’s magic because, no matter how many times it lets you down…you keep having hope in it.
You keep trusting it.
No matter how many times it fails you,
You never fail it.
Just like you never fail me.
I love that about you,
because of you.
(I set it back down and pull out a strip of paper and unfold it.)
Your mother.
(I sigh)
Your mother was an amazing woman, Lake.
I'm blessed that I got to know her,
And that she was a part of my life, too.
I came to love her as my own mom…just as she came to love Caulder and I as her own.
I didn’t love her because of you, Lake.
I loved her because of her.
So, thank you for sharing her with us.
She had more advice about
Life and love and happiness and heartache than anyone I've ever known.
But the best advice she ever gave me?
The best advice she ever gave us?
(I read the quote in my hands)
"Sometimes two people have to fall apart, to realize how much they need to fall back together."
(She’s definitely crying now. I place the slip back inside the satchel and take a step closer to the edge of the stage as I hold her gaze.)
The last item I have wouldn’t fit, because you’re actually sitting in it.
That booth.
You’re sitting in the exact same spot you sat in when you watched your first performance on this stage.
The way you watched this stage with passion in your eyes…I'll never forget that moment.
It's the moment I knew it was too late.
I was too far gone by then.
I was in love with you.
I was in love with you because of you.
(I back up and sit down on the stool behind me, still holding her stare.)
I could go on all night, Lake.
I could go on and on and on about all the reasons I'm in love with you.
And you know what? Some of them are the things that life has thrown our way.
I do love you because you're the only other person I know that understands my situation.
I do love you because both of us know what it's like to lose your mom and your dad.
I do love you because you're raising your little brother, just like I am.
I love you because of what you went through with your mother.
I love you because of what we went through with your mother.
I love the way you love Kel.
I love the way you love Caulder.
And I love the way I love Kel.
So I'm not about to apologize for loving all these things about you, no matter the reasons or the circumstances behind them.
And no, I don’t need days, or weeks, or months to think about why I love you.
It’s an easy answer for me.
I love you because of you.
Because of
every
single
thing
about you. "
― Colleen Hoover , Point of Retreat (Slammed, #2)
11
" Write poorly.
Suck
Write
awful
Terribly
Frightfully
Don't
care
Turn off the inner editor
Let yourself
write
Let it
flow
Let yourself
fail
Do something
crazy
Write fifty thousand words in the month of
November.
I did it.
It was
fun
, it was
insane
, it was
one thousand six
hundred and sixty-seven words a day.
It was
possible.
But you have to turn off your inner critic.
Off completely.
Just
write.
Quickly.
In
bursts.
With
joy.
If you can't write, run away for a few.
Come
back.
Write
again.
Writing is like anything else.
You won't get good at it immediately.
It's a craft, you have to keep getting better.
You don't get to Juilliard unless you practice.
If you want to get to Carnegie Hall,
practice, practice, practice.
...Or give them a lot of money.
Like anything else, it takes ten thousand hours to master.
Just like Malcolm Gladwell says.
So
write.
Fail.
Get your
thoughts
down.
Let it
rest.
Let it
marinate.
Then
edit.
But don't edit as you type,
that just slows the brain down.
Find a daily practice,
for me it's blogging every day.
And it's
fun.
The
more
you write, the
easier
it gets. The more it is a
flow,
the less a
worry.
It's not for
school,
it's not for a
grade,
it's just to get your thoughts
out there.
You
know
they want to come
out.
So
keep at it.
Make it a practice. And write
poorly,
write
awfully,
write with
abandon
and it may end up being
really
really
good.
"
― Colleen Hoover , Point of Retreat (Slammed, #2)
13
" Butterfly.
What a beautiful word
What a delicate creature.
Delicate like the cruel words that flow right out of your mouths and the food that flies right out of your hands…
Does it make you feel better?
Does it make you feel good ?
Does picking on a girl make you more of a man?
Well, I’m standing up for myself
Like I should have done before
I’m not putting up with your Butterfly anymore."
(Kiersten slides the sack off her wrist and opens it, pulling out a handful of hand-made butterflies. She takes the microphone out of the stand and begins walking down the stairs as she continues speaking.)
“I’d like to extend to others what others have extended to me.”
(She walks up to Mrs. Brill first and holds out a butterfly)
“Butterfly you, Mrs. Brill.”
(Mrs. Brill smiles at her and takes the butterfly out of her hands. Lake laughs out loud and I have to nudge her to get her to be quiet. Kiersten walks around the room, passing out butterflies to several of the students, including the three from the lunchroom.)
“Butterfly you, Mark.
Butterfly you, Brendan.
Butterfly you, Colby.”
(When she finishes passing out the butterflies, she walks back onto the stage and places the microphone back into the stand.)
“I have one thing to say to you
And I’m not referring to the bullies
Or the ones they pursue.
I’m referring to those of you that just stand by
The ones who don’t take up for those of us that cry
Those of you who just…turn a blind eye.
After all it’s not you it’s happening to
You aren’t the one being bullied
And you aren’t the one being rude
It isn’t your hand that’s throwing the food
But…it is your mouth not speaking up
It is your feet not taking a stand
It is your arm not lending a hand
It is your heart
Not giving a damn.
So take up for yourself
Take up for your friends
I challenge you to be someone
Who doesn’t give in.
Don’t give in.
Don’t let them win. "
― Colleen Hoover , Point of Retreat (Slammed, #2)
