182
" They tell us that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself,but I don't believe that." he said.
Then, a moment later, he added: "Oh,the fear is there, all right. It comes to us in many different forms, at different times, and overwhelms us. But the most frightening thing we can do at such times is to turn our backs on it, to close our eyes. For then we take the most precious thing inside us and surrender it to something else. In my case, that something was the wave. "
― Haruki Murakami , Kafka on the Shore
190
" The woman glares at him and, after taking a breath, forges on. "One other issue I'd like to raise is how you have authors here separated by sex."
"Yes, that's right. The person who was in charge before us cataloged these and for whatever reason divided them into male and female. We were thinking of recataloging all of them, but haven't been able to as of yet."
"We're not criticizing you for this," she says.
Oshima tilts his head slightly.
"The problem, though, is that in all categories male authors are listed before female authors," she says. "To our way of thinking this violates the principle of sexual equality and is totally unfair."
Oshima picks up her business card again, runs his eyes over it, then lays it back down on the counter. "Ms. Soga," he begins, "when they called the role in school your name would have come before Ms. Tanaka, and after Ms. Sekine. Did you file a complaint about that? Did you object, asking them to reverse the order? Does G get angry because it follows F in the alphabet? Does page 68 in a book start a revolution just because it follows 67?"
"That's not the point," she says angrily. "You're intentionally trying to confuse the issue."
Hearing this, the shorter woman, who'd been standing in front of a stack taking notes, races over.
"Intentionally trying to confuse the issue," Oshima repeats, like he's underlining the woman's words.
"Are you denying it?"
"That's a red herring," Oshima replies.
The woman named Soga stands there, mouth slightly ajar, not saying a word.
"In English there's this expression red herring. Something that's very interesting but leads you astray from the main topic. I'm afraid I haven't looked into why they use that kind of expression, though."
"Herrings or mackerel or whatever, you're dodging the issue."
"Actually what I'm doing is shifting the analogy," Oshima says. "One of the most effective methods of argument, according to Aristotle. The citizens of ancient Athens enjoyed using this kind of intellectual trick very much. It's a shame, though, that at the time women weren't included in the definition of 'citizen.'"
"Are you making fun of us?"
Oshima shakes his head. "Look, what I'm trying to get across is this: I'm sure there are many more effective ways of making sure that Japanese women's rights are guaranteed than sniffing around a small library in a little town and complaining about the restrooms and the card catalog. We're doing our level best to see that this modest library of ours helps the community. We've assembled an outstanding collection for people who love books. And we do our utmost to put a human face on all our dealings with the public. You might not be aware of it, but this library's collection of poetry-related material from the 1910s to the mid-Showa period is nationally recognized. Of course there are things we could do better, and limits to what we can accomplish. But rest assured we're doing our very best. I think it'd be a whole lot better if you focus on what we do well than what we're unable to do. Isn't that what you call fair? "
― Haruki Murakami , Kafka on the Shore
191
" You are a totally pathetic, historical example of the phallocentric, to put it mildly."
"A pathetic, historical example," Oshima repeats, obviously impressed. By his tone of voice he seems to like the sound of that phrase.
"In other words you're a typical sexist, patriarchic male," the tall one pipes in, unable to conceal her irritation.
"A patriarchic male," Oshima again repeats.
The short one ignores this and goes on. "You're employing the status quo and the cheap phallocentric logic that supports it to reduce the entire female gender to second-class citizens, to limit and deprive women of the rights they're due. You're doing this unconsciously rather than deliberately, but that makes you even guiltier. You protect vested male interests and become inured to the pain of others, and don't even try to see what evil your blindness causes women and society. I realize that problems with restrooms and card catalogs are mere details, but if we don't begin with the small things we'll never be able to throw off the cloak of blindness that covers our society. Those are the principles by which we act."
"That's the way every sensible woman feels," the tall one adds, her face expressionless.
[...]
A frozen silence follows.
"At any rate, what you've been saying is fundamentally wrong," Oshima says, calmly yet emphatically. "I am most definitely not a pathetic, historical example of a patriarchic male."
"Then explain, simply, what's wrong with what we've said," the shorter woman says defiantly.
"Without sidestepping the issue or trying to show off how erudite you are," the tall one adds.
"All right. I'll do just that—explain it simply and honestly, minus any sidestepping or displays of brilliance," Oshima says.
"We're waiting," the tall one says, and the short one gives a compact nod to show she agrees.
"First of all, I'm not a male," Oshima announces.
A dumbfounded silence follows on the part of everybody. I gulp and shoot Oshima a glance.
"I'm a woman," he says.
"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't joke around," the short woman says, after a pause for breath. Not much confidence, though. It's more like she felt somebody had to say something.
Oshima pulls his wallet out of his chinos, takes out the driver's license, and passes it to the woman. She reads what's written there, frowns, and hands it to her tall companion, who reads it and, after a moment's hesitation, gives it back to Oshima, a sour look on her face.
"Did you want to see it too?" Oshima asks me. When I shake my head, he slips the license back in his wallet and puts the wallet in his pants pocket. He then places both hands on the counter and says, "As you can see, biologically and legally I am undeniably female. Which is why what you've been saying about me is fundamentally wrong. It's simply impossible for me to be, as you put it, a typical sexist, patriarchic male."
"Yes, but—" the tall woman says but then stops. The short one, lips tight, is playing with her collar.
"My body is physically female, but my mind's completely male," Oshima goes on.
"Emotionally I live as a man. So I suppose your notion of being a historical example may be correct. And maybe I am sexist—who knows. But I'm not a lesbian, even though I dress this way. My sexual preference is for men. In other words, I'm a female but I'm gay. I do anal sex, and have never used my vagina for sex. My clitoris is sensitive but my breasts aren't. I don't have a period. So, what am I discriminating against? Could somebody tell me? "
― Haruki Murakami , Kafka on the Shore
