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The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2) QUOTES

The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2) QUOTES

1 " This is my knife. It is very sharp and very eager to hurt you. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

2 " Klaus sighed, and opened a book, and as at so many other times when the middle Baudelaire child did not want to think about his circumstances, he began to read. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

3 " How did you do that?” Mr. Poe asked. “Nice girls shouldn’t know how to do such things.”
“My sister is a nice girl,” Klaus said, “and she knows how to do all sorts of things. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

4 " I have gone into town to buy a few last things we need for the expedition: Peruvian wasp repellent, toothbrushes, canned peaches, and a fireproof canoe. It will take a while to find the peaches, so don't expect me back until dinnertime.
Stephano, Gustav's replacement, will arrive today by taxi. Please make him feel welcome. As you know, it is only two days until the expedition, so please work very hard today.
Your giddy uncle,
Monty "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

5 " This is an absurd moral, for you and I both know that sometimes not only is it good to lie, it is necessary to lie. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

6 " One of the most difficult things to think about in life is one's regrets. Something will happen to you, and you will do the wrong thing, and for years afterward you will wish you had done something different. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

7 " Count Olaf sounds like an awful person. I hope he is torn apart by wild animals someday. Wouldn't that be satisfying? "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

8 " Goodness! Golly! Good God! Blessed Allah! Zeus and Hera! Mary and Joseph! Nathaniel Hawthorne! Don't touch her! Grab her! Move closer! Run away! Don't move! Kill the snake! Leave it alone! Give it some food! Don't let it bite her! Lure the snake away! Here, snakey! Here, snakey snakey! "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

9 " How clever of you to figure that out,' said a voice at the top of the stairs, and Violet, and Klaus were so surprised they almost dropped the lamp. It was Stephano, or, if you prefer, it was Count Olaf. It was the bad guy. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

10 " When somebody is a little bit wrong - say, when a waited puts nonfat milk in your espresso macchiato, instead of lowfat milk - it is often quite easy to explain to them how and why they are wrong. But if somebody is surprisingly wrong - say, when a waiter bites your nose instead of taking your order - you can often be so surprised that you are unable to say anything at all. Paralyzed by how wrong the waiter is, your moth would hang slightly open and your eyes would blink over and over, but you would be unable to say a word. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

11 " Life is a conundrum of esoterica. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

12 " It is, as you know, very, very rude and usually unnecessary to use profanity. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

13 " Count Olaf was so obsessed with getting his filthy hands on the money that he hatched a devious plan that gives me nightmares to this day. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

14 " We all know, of course, that we should never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever fiddle around in any way with electric devices. Never. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

15 " Waiting is one of life’s hardships. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

16 " For Beatrice--My love for you shall live forever. You, however, did not. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

17 " It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try to readjust the way you thought of things. The Baudelaire orphans were crying not only for their Uncle Monty, but for their own parents, and this dark and curious feeling of falling that accompanies every great loss. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

18 " Right, good temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

19 " Simply put, dramatic irony is when a person makes a harmless remark, and someone else who hears it knows something that makes the remark have a different, and usually unpleasant, meaning. For instance, if you were in a restaurant and said out loud, "I can't wait to eat the veal marsala I ordered," and there were people around who knew that the veal marsala was poisoned and that you would die as soon as you took a bite, your situation would be one of dramatic irony. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)

20 " There are two types of panicking: standing still and not saying a word, and leaping all over the place babbling anything that comes into your head. "

― Lemony Snicket , The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)