Home > Work > The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2) QUOTES

The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2) QUOTES

1 " Nothing stands for content-free corporate bullshit quite like PowerPoint. And that's just scratching the surface... "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

2 " Britain is relying on you, Bob, so try not to make your usual hash of things. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

3 " The Laundry field operations manual is notably short on advice for how to comport one’s self when being held prisoner aboard a mad billionaire necromancer’s yacht, other than the usual stern admonition to keep receipts for all expenses incurred in the line of duty. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

4 " He stabs at the mouse mat with one finger and I wince, but instead of fat purple sparks and a hideous soul-sucking manifestation, it simply wakes up his Windows box. (Not that there’s much difference.) "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

5 " Fifteen minutes later I’m hunched over the steering wheel of a two-seater that looks like something you’d find in your corn flakes packet. The Smart is insanely cute and compact, does about seventy miles to a gallon, and is the ideal second car for nipping about town but I’m not nipping about town. I’m going flat out at maybe a hundred and fifty kilometers per hour on the autobahn while some joker is shooting at me from behind with a cannon that fires Porsches and Mercedes. Meanwhile, I’m stuck driving something that handles like a turbocharged baby buggy. I’ve got my fog lights on in a vain attempt to deter the other road users from turning me into a hood ornament, but the jet wash every time another executive panzer overtakes me keeps threatening to roll me right over onto my roof. And that’s before you factor in the deranged Serbian truck drivers driven mad with joy by exposure to a motorway that hasn’t been cluster-bombed and then resurfaced by the lowest bidder. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

6 " There’s a very loud noise in my ear, not unlike a cat sneezing, if the cat is the size of the Great Sphinx of Giza and it’s just inhaled three tons of snuff. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

7 " Then the screen comes on, showing a familiar menu on a blue background and I stare at it, transfixed, like a yokel who’s never seen a television before. Because it’s not a TV. It’s a flat-screen PC running Windows XP Media Center Edition. They can’t be that dumb. It’s got to be a trap, I gibber to myself. Not even the clueless cannon-fodder-in-jumpsuits who staff any one of the movies on the shelf would be that dumb! "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

8 " And because my employers agree with me, and they’re the government, you’re outvoted. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

9 " Someday I’ll write a textbook about personality profiling through possessions; but for now let’s just say this example is screaming “megalomaniac!” at me. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

10 " Some people can mess up anything, and computational demonology adds a new and unwelcome meaning to terms like “memory leak” and “debugger. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

11 " I don’t mind going without clothes, but being without a microprocessor is truly stripping down. It’s like asking a sorcerer to surrender his magic wand, or a politician to forswear his lies. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

12 " Nothing stands for content-free corporate bullshit quite like PowerPoint. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

13 " He monologued at me. With PowerPoint.★★ ★★He what? And you’re still sane? Obviously I underestimated you.★★ "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

14 " Some people you just do not want to leave outside the tent pissing in, and in my early twenties, self-confident and naïve, I was about as safe to leave lying around unsupervised as half a ton of sweating gelignite. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

15 " There’s no briefing sheet on what to do when a supernatural soul-sucking horror disguised as a beautiful woman starts crying on your shoulder. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

16 " I feel ill with emotional indigestion: I don’t think I’ve ever felt for Mo the kind of raw, priapic lust I feel for Ramona, but Ramona is a poisonous bloom—off-limits if I value my life. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

17 " The bastard knows I need to know what he knows and he knows I can’t say no. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

18 " Everything – the entire 400-megabuck investment, ten years of Company black operations – depends on what happens in the next few hours. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

19 " They’re nuts. Completely insane! I don’t get this gambling thing. Didn’t these people study statistics at university? Evidently not "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)

20 " ★★The geas Billington’s running. It’s the occult equivalent of a stateful firewall. It keeps out intruders, unless they run through the approach states in a permitted sequence. "

― Charles Stross , The Jennifer Morgue (Laundry Files #2)