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Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating QUOTES

Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating QUOTES

1 " I always thought I caught you in . . . a phase. His left eyebrow makes a fancy arch. Apparently you're just like this. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

2 " The way Emily describes it: when I meet someone I love, I become an octopus and wind my tentacles around their heart, tighter and tighter until they can't deny they love me just the same. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

3 " I realize I should be mortified that Past Hazel was so dramatically inappropriate, but it's not like I'm that much better now, and regret isn't really my speed anyway. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

4 " Turning, I yell over my shoulder, "Emily, your Korean name is Yujin?"
She nods. "He's is Jimin."
I look at him like I'm seeing a new person in front of me. The two syllables of his name are like a sensual exhale, something I might say immediatly preorgasm when words fail me. "That might be the hottest name I've ever heard, "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

5 " Getting Pretty Panties Ripped Requires Real Damn Initiative. Or--general, personal, possessive, reflexive, reciprocal, relative, demonstrative, and interrogative! "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

6 " But at the end of the day", she says, and puts her hand outside the open window, letting the wind pass through her fingers, "being myself is enough. I'm enough. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

7 " The world seems full of men who are initially infatuated by our eccentricities, but who ultimately expect them to be temporary. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

8 " I learned a very important thing that day: my mom would never try to change for a man, and I wouldn’t, either. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

9 " We both know Hazel is a butterfly. I think you have the power to take the dust from her wings. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

10 " He smiles, but it’s not a smile I’ve ever seen before. It’s a dangerous smile; he’s a movie villain, the seductive one, the one who robs you but fucks you real good first. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

11 " I saw it and I thought it would make you laugh.” Josh’s eyes soften, and he gives me such an adoring smile, it’s nearly painful. “You look ridiculous in that. I hope you wear it all day. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

12 " Are you listening?”
“Barely.”
“You are perfect for me. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

13 " I know I’m like Pig-Pen in Charlie Brown, and I have chaos around me, but it’s like he doesn’t even care. He doesn’t need me to change or pretend to be someone else. He’s my person. He’s my best friend. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

14 " I love you too, you know.”

His kiss turns into a smile. “Yeah?”

“I’ve probably loved you longer.”

A trickster grin. “Probably.”

I pinch his splendid ass for that and he growls, pressing into me. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

15 " I can say without question I’ve honestly never known anyone else like you.”
“So completely undatable?”
“Something like that. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

16 " Dave hands me the bread. Josh takes some chicken onto his plate.

The silence is homicidal.

Emily finishes her wine and Dave pours her more. For such a small thing, Emily can really pack it away.

“Winnie has worms,” I tell the table, and spread some butter on my bread. “Took her to the vet earlier. I was so worried I was going to have to treat it with some ointment in her butt, but—nope—just a pill.”

I take a sip of wine and grin at them. Josh puts his fork down and cups his forehead. But in a few beats they all break into laughter, and Emily looks over at me with my favorite kind of fondness.

“She doesn’t really have worms. I was just kidding.”

I am nothing if not a decent icebreaker. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

17 " Please tell me you’re not that guy right now.”

“What guy?”

“The guy you’ve always been, who wants me to be quirky but not weird, who wants me to dance only when other people are dancing, who likes telling all the stories about me but doesn’t remember how much he bitched about each of those moments when it happened. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

18 " I realize that finding the perfect person isn't going to be easy for me because I'm a lot to take," she says, "but I'm not going to change just so that I'm more datable. At the end of the day, being myself is enough. I'm enough. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

19 " Do you know how many guys like to date the cute wild girl for a few weeks before expecting me to chill a little and become more Regular Girlfriend? [..] But at the end of the day, [..] being myself is enough. I’m enough.”

She’s not saying it to convince me, or even herself; she’s already there. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating

20 " I wouldn’t exactly say we were scraping the bottom of the barrel by date seven, but Josh did feel the need to fake diarrhea, and I readily rushed him out to the car, apologizing profusely to our confused dates over my shoulder. "

― Christina Lauren , Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating