35
" And we’re going out.
Kill me.
‘Got everything?’ Mom asks, her voice all sing-songy. We’re acting normal. A short-lived facade when I open my bag and Operation Check Contents begins.
1. Phone to call for help if we have a car crash/get mugged/drive into the path of a tornado
2. Headphones to drown out the sound of people if we get caught in a crowd
3. Bottle of water for if we break down and get stranded in the middle of nowhere
4. Another bottle of water in case that other bottle leaks or evaporates
5. Tissues for nosebleeds, sneezing, crying, and/or drooling
6. Sanitizer to kill the germs you can catch from touching anything
7. Paper bag to breathe into or throw up in
8. Band-Aids and alcohol wipes in case open wounds should occur
9. Inhaler (I grew out of asthma when I was twelve, but you can’t be too careful when it comes to breathing)
10. A piece of string that serves no purpose but it’s been here since for ever and I’m afraid the world will implode if I don’t have it
11. A pair of nail scissors for any one of a trillion reasons, most of which conclude with me being kidnapped
12. And, finally, chewing gum to take away the sour taste I always get when the panic hits
Normal takes a nosedive into my bag, sinks beneath the copious amount of clutter, and dies a slow, painful death. "
― Louise Gornall , Under Rose-Tainted Skies
40
" Hi.’
Like a rabbit reacting to the sound of a gunshot, I retract my foot, scurry back inside, and slam the door shut.
That was close is my first thought. Followed by What was close? Pleasant conversation? Ugh. I press my back up against the door and wilt to the floor. I instantly dislike that a stranger has seen my crazy side, not once but twice within a week. I curl inwards, try hard to split the floor with my mind so I can seep through it.
Once I’m done reassembling my self-esteem, life goes the way it always does.
Technically, I don’t have to study on weekends, but I do anyway. I’m learning to speak French for a trip I’ll never take. I watch some TV, eat, sleep, build a pretty impressive yet rather unstable castle of saliva and peanut butter cookies. "
― Louise Gornall , Under Rose-Tainted Skies