6
" How many toes did I have when we left London, does anyone remember?" Jim asked, examining its feet. "I think one is missing."
"Stop fussing about a missing toe. We have more important things to focus on, like finding Drake and saving him from whatever trouble he’s in," I answered, straightening my clothing and zipping up my heavy parka.
"Oh, man, I am missing one! I know I had four on this foot! What sort of place was that company you used, demon-haters or something?"
"Budget Teleporters is a perfectly good company. Didn’t you listen to their warning about keeping your arms and legs in the portal at all times? "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
10
" A drunken party girl and her equally drunken escort got onto the elevator at that moment. The girl spotted Drake and lurched toward him, an inviting smile on her face as she thrust her barely concealed breasts at him. “Hello, handsome. Would you hold me against you if I told you it was beautiful?”
I pushed myself between her and Drake. “He’s very handsome, isn’t he? And verytaken.”
“Fat bitch,” she snapped, sulking for a moment until she spotted Pál. Her companion slouched against the wall of the elevator, too far gone to care, I guess.
The door opened at our floor and we exited, leaving the drunken woman to pout as Pál avoided her grasp. I stopped just outside the door, pulled on Drake’s fire, and set alight a ring at her feet. She shrieked and flapped her arms wildly as the doors started to close. I drew a quick ward on them, and before the outer doors blocked my way, mentally stamped out the fire. I turned to find Drake watching me with crossed arms and a cocked eyebrow.
“What?” I asked, trying unsuccessfully to bat my eyelashes at him.
“You locked them in there with fire?”
“There was a fire extinguisher,” I said. “Of course, she’s probably too drunk to notice it or know how to use it, but that’s hardly my problem.”
Drake continued to give me the Eyebrow of Much Displeasure.
“There were sprinklers as well. They’re sure to go off at some point…oh, for heaven’s sake, Drake! What sort of person do you take me for? I put out the fire just before the doors closed, OK? I just wanted to scare her a little. I may be a demon lord, but I’m not ademon lord! I wouldn’t barbecue a person just because she called me fat.”
“Hey, Ash, you know that you’re getting fa—”
“You are not a person,” I told Jim. “If you don’t want me to singe off a few whiskers, you’ll pipe down.”
“Yeesh! "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
11
" Maybe I’d better start at the beginning…”
“You’re gonna want to sit down,” Jim told the dragon. “Once she gets going, it’s hard to stop her.”
“Silence, demonic one,” I said, smiling at Bastiano. If I thought he looked surprised at the news that we weren’t there to banish him, he was downright flabbergasted by the time I was done relating the pertinent events of the last few months.
“You were the mate of the green wyvern—I am glad to know that Drake still has charge of the sept—but now you are Fiat’s mate?” he asked.
“In name only. Fiat tricked us into that situation. He’s…well, you know what he is.”
Bastiano nodded. “Cruel,” he said.
“Bastard,” Jim said with a sniff.
“Evil to the core,” said Rene.
“Looks like a porn star,” added Uncle Damian. “Don’t trust men who look like they make their livings with their dicks.”
A slight flush rose on Bastiano’s cheeks.
“Present company excluded, naturally,” I told him, shooting my uncle a glance. "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
12
" What were you looking for over here?” Jim asked again.
“I wonder if you can exorcise hands…hmm? Oh, where on the wall was that place I sent you through before. Do you remember?”
Jim shook its head. “Why are you looking for that particular spot? It have fond memories for you or something?”
“Hardly. You told me that it was easier to tear the fabric of existence in a spot where it had previously been rent. And I know I sent you through it from this room, but I don’t remember where, exactly.” I glanced at the clock on the mantel, leaping to my feet when I saw the time. “Oh my god. Oh my god! Tell me that clock isn’t right!”
“That clock isn’t right.”
Relief made me sag a bit as I dug through my purse looking for my cell phone. “Thank god. I was worried there for a minute that I’d missed the wedding.”
“You have,” Jim said complacently, snuffling around behind the fainting couch.
“What? You just told me the clock was wrong!”
“Yuh-uh. And who ordered me to tell her that?”
“Gah!” I screamed, punching a speed-dial number into the phone. “Talk about your day from hell…Jim, look around and find the weak spot. I’m not going to let something like a deranged Guardian ruin my day.”
“Sooo many things I could say to that,” Jim said, shaking its head. “I’ll confine myself to pointing out that even if I found the spot, it wouldn’t do you any good.”
“It wouldn’t? Why not?”
Inside my head, a dark, sinuous voice whistled a peppy little tune.
I ground my teeth. “Don’t tell me—I’d have to use the dark power in order to push us through.”
“Yup.”
Smirk.
“Bloody he—Drake!”
“Aisling?” I held the phone away from my ear at the sound of Drake’s roar.
“Hi, sweetie. Um. I guess we’re even on the whole jilting-at-the-altar thing, huh?”
“Where are you? Where have you been? Why have you not answered my calls?” Drake growled. “Rene and your uncle said you just disappeared on the street. Have you been harmed?”
“I’m fine. Jim’s here with me. I’m in…er…oh, hell.”
“Abaddon,” Jim corrected. "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
13
" I stared at Jim in horror, my skin crawling. “A Guardian banished me. Me! But I’m a Guardian. Can we banish each other? Oh, crap!”
Jim nodded. “You’re not just a Guardian, you’re a Guardian Plus! Now with extra ‘prince of Abaddon’ cleaning power.”
I’d like to point out—the dark power’s voice started to say.
“I have enough on my plate right now!” I snapped at it.
The voice sulked into silence.
“Yeah, well, you may just have to deal with it,” Jim said, moseying over to where I’d been standing. “What were you looking for?”
“I can’t believe another Guardian banished me just because I happen to be a prince of Abaddon. There should be some rule about not banishing demon lords who are also Guardians.”
Jim cocked an eyebrow. “Like you think this is a normal situation?”
“Normal? I don’t even know what’s normal anymore,” I fumed, marching around the room while wringing my hands. “And now look, I’m wringing my hands. Have you ever known me to be a hand-wringer? I detest the sort of woman who wrings her hands! It signifies weakness, and lack of coherence, and a totally unprofessional attitude!”
“And if we know anything about you, it’s that you’re a professional, and you’re confident,” Jim said, nosing a spot on the floor.
“Damn straight I am!” I yelled, forcing my hands apart so they couldn’t wring themselves. “Look, they’re trying to do it again. It’s like my hands are possessed or something! Dear god, it’s the dark power. The dark power has taken over my hands and is trying to wring me into insanity!”
“Is this little drama going to take long? ’Cause if it is, I want popcorn and a Diet Coke with extra ice.”
“You’re not going to like where I put the popcorn and extra ice,” I said, ignoring my possessed hands to glare at the demon with much intent.
Jim’s eyes widened as it backed away. “You’ve got that evil, slightly insane look down pat. Have you been practicing? We’re talking seriously scary, Ash. Hannibal-Lecter-has-nothing-on-you sort of scary.”
“Enough banter from you, buster,” I said, trying to pull myself together. “Let’s go over this situation again calmly. One: the dark power has taken over my hands.”
I have not!
“Not listening! Two: there is a Guardian out there who can banish me at will. Which means that every other Guardian can probably do the same. Lovely. Just what I need—more people trying to do me in.”
I slumped down into a chair and thought seriously about crying, but dropped that thought when my hands crept to ward each other. "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
17
" Damn.” I slumped back into the seat of the car as Rene drove, worrying like crazy despite the reassuring presence of Drake beside me.
“You do not have the look of a bride,” Rene commented, watching me in the rearview mirror, narrowly missing plowing down a group of schoolgirls crossing the road. “You have the look of one carrying the load of many burdens upon her shoulders.”
“Ack!” I yelled, pointing out the front window.
He glanced at the large truck against which we had, by some miracle, escaped smashing ourselves to smithereens. “Pfft. I was nowhere near that lorry.”
“Had to be a good two inches of space between us,” Jim commented, peering out the window at the truck as its driver screamed and clutched his chest while slamming on his brakes. “You’re losing your touch, Rene.”
My friend, chauffeur, and fate extraordinaire just grinned and gave his particularly Gallic shrug. “I will do better the next time, hein?”
“My money is on you, my man,” Jim replied. "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
18
" I sobbed out the story of the day thus far, too far gone in my relief to see Drake to care that I was watering his tux again.
“Kincsem, I understand that it was difficult to be banished in that way. I do not understand why you believe your hands are possessed, but I am confident you will fill me in on that aspect of your day. We must leave now, however. I cannot protect this house, and I will not have you at further risk.”
I sniffled and accepted the tissues that he had recently started carrying. “I know. And I want to go. I’m just so glad you’re here. Sometimes things get so overwhelming, and only when you’re around do I feel better.”
Drake tipped my chin up, his eyes sparkling with a brilliant emerald light. “That has to be one of the nicest things you’ve said to me. You have made yourself necessary to me, as well.”
I balled up my fingers and punched him in the stomach.
He laughed as he rubbed his belly, then pulled me tightly against his chest. “All right, I will say it, but you must make note that this fulfills the requirement for the day.”
“Too much talking and not enough kissing,” I said as I grabbed his head and pulled it down to me. His kiss was as hot as his dragon fire, scorching more than just my lips. His tongue danced along mine, driving me into squirming against him, wanting what only he could give me.
“Give it,” I whispered into his mouth, and quivered to the tips of my toes when he opened his mouth and let his fire sweep through me. It blazed a trail along my veins, burning my blood, carrying me along in an inferno of desire, love, and need.
“I love you more than all the treasures of the world, Aisling. Our love will burn for an eternity until we have taken our last breaths, and even then it will continue to shine as a testament to that which we are together, a beacon of passion for all to see like a glittering star in the darkness of the night sky.”
“You sure know how to sweep a girl off her feet,” I said, kissing the corners of his delectable mouth as his dragon fire faded away. I felt empty inside without it, as if a part of me was missing, a sadness so profound it made my soul weep. “I love you, too.”
“We must leave. I do not like this place.”
“I know the feeling "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
19
" Uncle Damian crossed his arms and gave me a stern, unyielding, wholly unsympathetic look. For some odd reason, it made me feel immensely better. “Buck up, woman! You just took a hard left to the gut, but I trained you better than this.”
“I’m pregnant,” I said, sniffling as I wiped up the last of my messy tears. “I’m allowed to be emotional.”
“You’re not allowed to be an idiot, and that’s the path you’re heading down if you don’t stop right now. I trained you to be a smart, savvy woman who could handle herself in any situation. Now let’s see the last of this pitiful creature, and more of the Aisling I know you can be.”
He was right. I straightened my shoulders, lifting my chin as I sniffled my last sniffle. Drake wasn’t excluding me because he wanted to—he’d always been proud of me as his mate, demanding I be at his side for everything. I was just giving in to my hormones, and that wasn’t going to help anyone. If I wanted things to change, I’d have to see to it myself. “You’re absolutely right. Dammit, I am a Guardian. I am a wyvern’s mate—we won’t go into whose right now because that’s all screwed up—but I am still a wyvern’s mate, and that’s important.”
Righteous indignation filled me, but it was a cleansing, energizing emotion.
“That’s better,” Uncle Damian nodded as I stormed over to the window and flung back the curtain.
“And I am a demon lord, one of the seven princes of Abaddon!” I yelled, spinning around to face him, shaking my fist to the ceiling. “As god is my witness, I’ll never go hungry again!”
“Eh…” Uncle Damian pursed his lips.
“Sorry. Got carried away with the moment. Jim, Traci! I summon thee!”
Both demons appeared before me just as Rene cracked open the door and peered in.
“Is everything all right? We heard yelling.”
“Come in and join the fun,” I said as he slowly came into the room, Nora on his heels. “Everything’s crap right now, but it’s about to get a whole lot better "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
20
" What are you going to do if you can’t challenge him?” I asked, ashamed of the pathetic tone of misery in my voice.
Drake smiled. His lips curled up, and his eyes went dragon as the smile grew in a way that made me thankful he was on my side. “I am wyvern of the green dragons.”
“Yeah, so?”
“Such a look of confusion in your beautiful face. What do green dragons do best?”
“You’re not going to make love to him,” I said, scandalized for a moment even though I knew Drake couldn’t mean that.
He gave me a long-suffering look. “Hardly.”
“Well, good. Because I told you once I don’t share, not even with another guy, although I have to admit that…um…never mind.”
One of Drake’s eyebrows rose. “Such unplumbed depths to you. I’m afraid that particular fantasy will never be fulfilled. I hold what is mine. No others will have you.”
I smiled at the slightly outraged glint in his eyes. “Don’t worry, it’s not a fantasy. I always kind of wondered what it would be like to have so much attention, but then I met you, and, well, I don’t think I could survive more attention than what you give me.”
“That was the correct answer,” he said, his voice rich with smugness.
“Uh-huh. OK, so back to Fiat…” I pulled my mind from the delightful sensations Drake’s hands and mouth were giving me, and thought hard. If he couldn’t challenge Fiat, what could he do? Drake was a man of many talents, but I couldn’t think of one that would help him get me back without some sort of fight between him and Fiat.
And then the penny dropped.
I started laughing, causing Drake to pause as he unbuttoned my shirt. “Figured it out, did you?”
“I’m allowed to be a bit slow. I’ve had a hell of a day. So, my darling green dragon…what treasure of Fiat’s are you going to steal? "
― Katie MacAlister , Holy Smokes (Aisling Grey, #4)
