42
" And because the transformation is going to be from the self toward a state of no-self, agony is very deep. But you cannot have ecstasy without going through agony. If the gold wants to be purified, it has to pass through fire. Love is fire. It is because of the pain of love that millions of people live a loveless life. They, too, suffer, and their suffering is futile. To suffer in love is not to suffer in vain. To suffer in love is creative; it takes you to higher levels of consciousness. To suffer without love is utterly a waste; it leads you nowhere, it keeps you moving in the same vicious circle. The man who is without love is narcissistic, he is closed. He knows only himself. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
43
" When you fall in love with a woman, watch, be alert—it may be nothing but narcissism. The woman’s face, and her eyes, and her words, may be simply functioning as a lake in which you are seeing your reflection. My own observation is this: Out of a hundred loves, ninety-nine are narcissistic. People don’t love the woman that is there. They love the appreciation that the woman is giving to them, the attention that the woman is giving to them, the flattery that the woman is showering on the man. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
44
" What you call poetry and passion are nothing but lies—with beautiful facades. Out of your hundred poets, ninety-nine are not really poets but only people in a state of turmoil, emotion, passion, heat, lust, sexuality, sensuality. Only one out of your hundred poets is a real poet. And the real poet may never compose any poetry, because his whole being is poetry. The way he walks, the way he sits, the way he eats, the way he sleeps—it is all poetry. He exists as poetry. He may create poetry, he may not create poetry, that is irrelevant. But what you call poetry is nothing but the expression of your fever, of your heated state of consciousness. It is a state of insanity. Passion is insane, blind, unconscious—because it gives you the feeling as if it is love. Love "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
45
" Love is the nourishment for the soul. Just as food is to the body, so love is to the soul. Without food the body is weak, without love the soul is weak. And no state, no church, no vested interest has ever wanted people to have strong souls, because a person with spiritual energy is bound to be rebellious. Love makes you rebellious, revolutionary. Love gives you wings to soar high. Love gives you insight into things, so that nobody can deceive you, exploit you, oppress you. And the priests and the politicians survive only on your blood; they survive only on exploitation. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
54
" Once you are in a relationship you start taking each other for granted—that’s what destroys all love affairs. The woman thinks she knows the man, the man thinks he knows the woman. Nobody knows either! It is impossible to know the other, the other remains a mystery. And to take the other for granted is insulting, disrespectful. To think that you know your wife is very, very ungrateful. How can you know the woman? How can you know the man? They are processes, they are not things. The woman that you knew yesterday is not there today. So much water has gone down the Ganges; she is somebody else, totally different. Relate again, start again, don’t take it for granted. And the man that you slept with last night, look at his face again in the morning. He is no more the same person, so much has changed. So much, incalculably much has changed. That is the difference between a thing and a person. The furniture in the room is the same, but the man and the woman, they are no more the same. Explore again, start again. That’s what I mean by relating. Relating means you are always starting, you are continuously trying to become acquainted. Again and again, you are introducing yourself to each other. You are trying to see the many facets of the other’s personality. You are trying to penetrate deeper and deeper into his realm of inner feelings, into the deep recesses of his being. You are trying to unravel a mystery that cannot be unraveled. That is the joy of love: the exploration of consciousness. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
55
" Go into it, suffer love, because through the suffering comes great ecstasy. Yes, there is agony, but out of the agony, ecstasy is born. Yes, you will have to die as an ego, but if you can die as an ego, you will be born as God, as a buddha. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
57
" teaching consists of two words, “meditation” and “love.” Meditate so that you can feel immense silence, and love so that your life can become a song, a dance, a celebration. You will have to move between the two, and if you can move easily, if you can move without any effort, you have learned the greatest thing in life. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
59
" Quando dipendi dall'altro c'é sempre miseria. Nel momento in cui sei dipendente, cominci a sentirti miserabile, poichè la dipendenza è schiavitù. Allora cominci a vendicarti in modi sottili, perché la persona da cui devi dipendere acquista potere su di te. [...] Che cosa stanno facendo mariti e mogli? Certo, l'amore è molto raro; lottare è la regola, amare è un'eccezione. Ed essi tentano di dominare in tutti i modi, persino attraverso l'amore. Se il marito chiede alla moglie di fare l'amore, lei si nega, è subdola. Alla fine si concede, ma con molta riluttanza; vuole che tu le scodinzoli intorno. E il marito fa la stessa cosa. Quando la moglie ha bisogno del suo amore e glielo chiede, il marito dice che è stanco. In ufficio c'era troppo lavoro e lui vorrebbe andare a dormire. [...] Questi sono i modi con cui si manipola, si affama l'altro; lo si fa diventare sempre più affamato, e quindi sempre più dipendente. [...] Questo non è amore, è una continua contrattazione. E tutti contrattano continuamente sul prezzo; è una lotta perenne. [...] Il dominio ha a che fare con l'odio, con la rabbia, con l'ostilità. Come puoi pensare di dominare qualcuno che ami? Vorresti vederlo totalmente libero, indipendente; gli vorresti dare maggiore individualità. Ecco perché lo definisco il più grande paradosso: persone simili sono insieme a tal punto da essere quasi uno, ma in quell'unità sono ancora individui. Le loro individualità non sono cancellate, si sono rafforzate. La libertà le ha arricchite entrambe. "
― Osho , Love, Freedom, and Aloneness: The Koan of Relationships
