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Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1) QUOTES

Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1) QUOTES

1 " If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

2 " I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

3 " By Aladdin's lamplit scrotum, man! Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

4 " In business, as in politics, the public is ever so tolerant of those who slime. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

5 " The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

6 " Nothing evokes the prurient like puritanism. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

7 " I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

8 " May the IRS find that you deduct your pet sheep as an entertainment expense. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

9 " The netherworld is timeless and unchanging, and boring -- much like a doctor's waiting room. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

10 " Slowly and gently, Augustus Brine explained to the king of the Djinn about the illusion created by motion pictures. When he finished, he felt like he had just raped the tooth fairy in front of a class of kindergartners. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

11 " Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

12 " One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

13 " Rachel could not believe what she was hearing. Accepting that her magic worked was a huge step, yet she was speaking to the evidence. But to be offered the power to rule the world? She wasn't sure her career in exercise instruction had prepared her for this. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

14 " For the tourist, immersed in the oblivion of vacation spending, Cypress Street provided a bonanza of curious gifts to prove to the folks back home that they had been somewhere. Somewhere where they had obviously forgotten that soon they would return home to a mortgage, dental bills, and an American Express bill that would descend at the end of the month like a financial Angel of Death. And they bought. They bought effigies of "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

15 " In Breeze’s business one got used to running across the skeletons in people’s closets. If Billy’s skeleton wore women’s underwear, it didn’t really matter. Homosexuality on Billy Winston was like acne on a leper. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

16 " Everyone at the bar turned toward The Breeze and waited, as if the next few words he spoke would reveal the true meaning of life, the winning numbers of the lottery, and the unlisted phone number of God. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

17 " To say that Effrom was not a particularly good cook was an understatement akin to saying that genocide is not a particularly effective public relations strategy. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

18 " Creatures of the night were rising from their resting places and venturing forth to feed on their unsuspecting victims. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

19 " He had tapped into the Zen of ignorance, the enlightenment of absurdity. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)

20 " Die Behauptung, daß Effrom nicht besonders gut kochen konnte, war eine Untertreibung von ähnlichem Kaliber wie die Feststellung, daß es sich bei Völkermord um eine nicht besonders erfolgversprechende PR-Strategie handele. "

― Christopher Moore , Practical Demonkeeping (Pine Cove, #1)