182
" Three and a half hours and a lot of curse words and tears later, my hands still ached, my elbows did too, and every step I took hurt the joints in my knees and the painfully stretched skin covering them. If I didn’t have black pants on, I was sure I’d look like I’d gotten into a fight with a bear cub and lost. Bad.
Feeling defeated but trying my best not to, I sucked in one breath after another, forcing my feet to keep fucking going until I made it to the stupid-ass parking lot.
I’d gone through periods of pure rage toward everything on the way down. Over the trail in the first place. Over doing this. Over the sun being out. At my mom for bamboozling me. I’d even been pissed off at my boots and would have taken them off and thrown them into the trees, but that was considered littering and there were too many rocks.
It was the boots’ fault for being slippery, the sons of bitches. I was donating them the first chance I got, I’d decided at least ten times. Maybe I’d burn them.
Okay, I wouldn’t because it was bad for the environment and there was still a fire ban in effect, but whatever.
Pieces of shit. "
― Mariana Zapata , All Rhodes Lead Here
184
" Let’s go, I’ll walk you down and get you cleaned up.”
“You will?”
He slanted me a look before picking up his trekking poles and backpack, slipping the straps on, then maneuvering the two sticks through crisscrossing cords on his back, leaving his arms free. Finally aiming his body back up the trail toward me, he held out his hand.
I hesitated but set my forearm into his open palm, and I watched as some emotion I didn’t initially recognize slid over his face.
“I meant your backpack, angel. I’ll take it for you. The trail’s not wide enough for both of us to go down at the same time,” he said, his voice sounding oddly hoarse.
Maybe if I hadn’t been in so much pain, and been so damn cranky, I would’ve been embarrassed. But I wasn’t, so I nodded, shrugged, and gingerly tried to take my backpack off. Luckily, I just started to shimmy a strap off when I felt the weight leave my shoulders as he tugged it away.
“Are you sure?”
“Positive” was all he replied with. “Come on. We’ve got half an hour to get back to the trailhead.”
My whole body slumped. “Half an hour?” I’d thought I had… ten minutes max.
My landlord pressed his lips together and nodded.
Was he trying not to laugh? I wasn’t sure because he turned around and started heading down the path ahead of me. But I was pretty sure I saw his shoulders shaking a little.
“Let me know when you want water” was one of the only two things he said on the way down.
The other being, “Are you humming what I think you’re humming?”
And me replying with “Yes.”
“Big Girls Don’t Cry.” I had no shame.
I tripped twice, and he turned around both times, but I gave him a tight smile and acted like nothing had happened.
Like he predicted, thirty minutes later, when I was basically wheezing and he was acting like this was a stroll down a paved path, I spotted the parking lot and almost cried.
We’d made it.
I’d made it.
And my hands hurt even worse from how dry the cuts were, and my elbows felt the same way, and I was sure my knees would too, but their joints were so bad, they didn’t have room to wonder about any other pain.
But just as I started heading toward my car, Rhodes slipped his fingers around my biceps and steered me toward his work truck. He didn’t say another word as he unlocked it and dropped the tailgate, shooting me a look over his shoulder as he patted it briefly before heading around to the passenger door.
I went straight for the tailgate and eyed it, trying to figure out how to sit on it without using my hands to boost myself up.
That was how he found me: staring at it and trying to decide if I went face-first and shimmied up on my stomach, I could wiggle around and sit up on my butt eventually.
“I’m trying to figure out how to—okay.”
He scooped me up, one arm under the backs of my knees, the other around my lower back, and planted me on the truck. In a sitting position. Like it was no big deal. I smiled at him.
“Thanks.” I would’ve figured it out, but it was the thought that counted. "
― Mariana Zapata , All Rhodes Lead Here
195
" Don’t mistake me giving you space as me not being interested. It’s not every woman I let into my bed, much less into my life, and even more into Amos’s life. Before you, it’d been nobody. So just because I don’t know what your mouth tastes like yet doesn’t mean I haven’t thought about it. Doesn’t mean I’m not going to. But Sofie would tell you I’ve got a big, fragile heart, and I think I do, so I need you to know what you want for my sake too, Buddy. Does that make it clear?” I was having a heart attack. Maybe even melting. As tired as I was, I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to sleep next to that all night. He might as well have pinned me down and licked down my body, because I’d never heard anything more erotic or amazing in my life. "
― Mariana Zapata , All Rhodes Lead Here
197
" Well, if you want to sleep naked, I’m okay with it.” The burst of his laughter surprised the shit out of me, and I couldn’t help but laugh too. This was so right, there was no reason to rush anything. “No thanks,” he said once his laugh slowed. I’d made a lot of people laugh in my life, but I wasn’t sure I’d ever felt this triumphant. “If you change your mind, go for it,” I told him, totally serious. “My body is too tired, but my eyeballs aren’t.” He laughed some more, the sounds slow and subtle and raspy. If I could’ve bottled it up, I would have, because all I could do when I heard it was smile. "
― Mariana Zapata , All Rhodes Lead Here
