" Quick! What aisle are the douches in? I've got three bitches at the beach cottage and they all stick to high heaven." ... " You do carry Massengill, don't you? That's the best brand, according to my research." " Ah..." What kind of man researches douches? A man who goes to bed with three women... " Would you mind checking your inventory in the back? I'll need more." " I'm not allowed to leave the register, but I'll be happy to page our stock boy." Douche-man grunted and flipped the package around. " It's gonna take at least two boxes for Loa. She's big. Got wide hips. Skinny legs, though. Kinda like a twenty-gallon tank on toothpicks. "