Home > Author > Sophia Dembling
1 " Ah, yes, the mix tape. The mating call of the introvert. "
― Sophia Dembling , Introverts in Love: The Quiet Way to Happily Ever After
2 " Historically, psychologists have looked at introversion as the absence of extroversion. They measure extroversion, and if you are low in it, then you are considered an introvert. This perpetuates the perception of introversion as negative space, and introverted activities as not really doing anything. We need to train ourselves, and others, out of this idea. We need to start seeing doing nothing (or reading, or working alone on projects, or whatever it is we do to recharge) as activities that are as valid as any social event. "
3 " Jung was the first to propose the model of psychic energy, suggesting that for introverts, energy flows inward, while for extroverts, energy flows outward. Introverts tend to embrace this definition. It fels right for us because we know exactly what it feels like to have our energy depleted when we have sent too much flowing outward. "
― Sophia Dembling , The Introvert's Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World
4 " Hiding your introversion is a bad idea because introversion itself is not a problem. It only causes problems if different needs affect factored into a burgeoning relationship and handled with respect and understanding. No doubt introversion-related issues will come up over time in a long-term relationship--healthy relationships are fluid and ever changing--but if you start out being honest with yourself and the other person, you will have built a foundation for later adaptation, compromise, and mutual comfort and happinesses. "
5 " Extroverts sparkle, introverts glow. Extroverts are fireworks, introverts are a fire in the hearth. "
6 " The introvert's dilemma is that we might not get a lot of invitations for the kind of socializing we like best--small, mellow gatherings. In other words, the kind of socializing other introverts like to do. Because, let's face it: We're introverts. We're all at home waiting to be invited to do introvert things. Which means, of course, that none of us are getting the invitations we crave. It's an introvert standoff. "
7 " Nine out of ten introverts agree: The telephone is the tool of the devil. "
8 " Being lucky in love might be less a matter of luck and more a matter of paying attention. "
9 " I've been accused my whole life of being "too sensitive". This actually kind of pisses me off, but maybe that's just because I'm too sensitive. "
― Sophia Dembling
10 " We may have, she suggests, a thin boundary between our conscious and unconscious minds, living with one foot in the real world and one in the world inside our heads. "
11 " One of the risks of being quiet is that the other people can fill your silence with their own interpretation: You’re bored. You’re depressed. You’re shy. You’re stuck up. You’re judgemental. When others can’t read us, they write their own story—not always one we choose or that’s true to who we are. "
12 " What is a friend? We probably all have our own definitions. For me, it's someone I don't feel alone with. Who doesn't bore me. Whose life I connect with and who takes reciprocal interest in my life. It's someone I feel comfortable turning to when I need to be talked off the ledge, and for whom I am glad to return the favor. Just a few people in my life fit that bill. "
13 " Introverts think carefully before they speak. We can be excellent public speakers because we prepare carefully. "
14 " Every introvert alive knows the exquisite pleasure of stepping from the clamor of a party into the bathroom and closing the door "
15 " It's not that introverts aren't good team players. We just don't need to be in the same room as the rest of the team at all times. We would much prefer to have part of the project carved out for us to squirrel away with it in our offices, consulting as necessary but working independently. "
16 " Just because I’m quiet doesn’t mean I have nothing to say. "
17 " We didn't know you were an introvert, we thought you were just a bitch. "
18 " We know what it feels like to have our energy drained by too much interaction. It feels like my brain is tired, almost like a muscle would be tired. The more depleted my psychic energy is, the slower my thoughts come, the harder it is to speak full sentences or focus on what’s going on around me. My senses become even more sensitive; noise and fuss are more overwhelming. And I become tense, irritated, cranky. That’s when I know I need to stop, sit down, let my brain relax and put up its metaphorical feet. "
19 " Another explained, “I think I’d speak for any introvert when I say if you could hear all the thoughts running through an introvert’s mind at any given moment—you’d feel like you’d just had your ear talked off for the last hour. "
20 " There’s absolutely nothing wrong with finding our own thoughts more interesting than a long story about someone’s husband’s niece’s gum surgery. Introverts "
