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181 " Born for Love: Why Empathy Is Essential—and Endangered Maia Szalavitz and Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. "
― Bruce D. Perry , What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing
182 " Together: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World Vivek H. Murthy, M.D. "
183 " BrainFacts.Org: This is the most reliable, accurate, and accessible resource for anyone interested in the brain. It is a public information initiative that is a collaboration between the Society for Neuroscience, the Kavli Foundation, and the Gatsby Charitable Foundation. "
184 " But if the adults who live with, teach, and treat these children are not regulated, they will not be able to be fully present in a compassionate, regulated way. "
185 " Isolated and disconnected, we are vulnerable. In community, we can protect one another, cooperatively hunt and gather, share with the dependents of our family, our clan. Relational glue keeps our species alive, and love is relational superglue "
186 " THE NEUROSEQUENTIAL MODEL AND THE WORK OF DR. PERRY: The Neurosequential Network (Neurosequential.com): This site outlines the research, clinical programs, and other educational activities of the Neurosequential Network "
187 " The developmental process is very front-loaded, meaning that the majority of brain growth and organization takes place in the first years of life. Now, this doesn’t mean that the brain won’t change after early childhood, but early life experiences do have a very powerful impact on how we develop. "
188 " human beings have been human beings—in this genetic form—for about 250,000 years. And for 99.9 percent of that time, we lived in hunter-gatherer bands of relatively small multifamily groups. "
189 " The Wisdom of Sundays: Life-Changing Insights from Super Soul Conversations "
190 " Born for Love, about the essential nature of empathy. "
191 " is in the small moments, when we feel the other person fully present, fully engaged, connected, and accepting, that we make the most powerful, enduring bonds. "
192 " When young children hear fewer words, they can still learn to speak—they’ll just be less fluent. In the same way, when children have fewer relational interactions, they’ll still develop social capabilities—they’ll just be less mature, more self-centered, more self-absorbed. "
193 " Neglect is most destructive early in life, when the brain is rapidly growing; early neglect interferes with the child’s getting the necessary stimulation required for normal development. "
194 " the most powerful and enduring human interactions are often very brief. You can spend hours with someone, but if you are not present and attentive, the hours are less powerful than these brief cereal moments. "
195 " many people in our society, including children and youth, are touch-starved. Healthy touch is not well understood. We actually have schools where tiny toddlers whose impulse is to run up and hug a classmate or teacher are told not to touch; in return, the teachers and other caregivers are not allowed to touch the children. But it’s simply unhealthy for a three-or four-year-old child to go eight hours without touching or hugging or playfully wrestling with another person. "
196 " The typical college-age adult is 30 percent “less empathic” and more self-absorbed than twenty years ago. One study documented a 40 percent increase in psychopathology in American college students over the last thirty years; the authors suggest that this is related to “cultural shifts towards extrinsic goals such as materialism and status and away from intrinsic goals, such as community, meaning in life, and affiliation. "
197 " Our society’s transgenerational social fabric is fraying. We’re disconnecting. I think that’s making us more vulnerable to adversity, and I think it’s a significant factor in the increases in anxiety, suicide, and depression we are seeing currently, even before the COVID-19 pandemic. "
198 " That’s not necessarily bad—until it becomes so pleasing and engaging to the brain that we begin to prefer it to other less-stimulating, less-busy sensory input. An infant or toddler consumed by a screen is missing out on other critical forms of learning about the world. They should be exploring what things feel like, smell like, taste like. They should be making sense of their world using all their sensory tools. "
199 " We are now raising our children and youth in environments that are both relationally impoverished and sensory overloading from the proliferation of screen-based technologies. "
200 " done. Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different. But we cannot move forward if we’re still holding on to the pain of that past. All of us who have been broken and scarred by trauma have the chance to turn those experiences into what Dr. Perry and I have been talking about: post-traumatic wisdom. Forgive yourself, forgive them. Step out of your history and into the path of your future. "