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The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate QUOTES

The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate QUOTES

1 " When you put yourself in the other person's shoes, you can see that the person critiquing you is merely trying to help. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

2 " When faced with difficult situation and to develop confidence at such crucial times, ask yourself these:
- When have I done something difficult... and survived?
- When have I made wise choices?
- What process have I used when making successful decisions? "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

3 " When you make a decision, own it. Never apologize for your decision - even if you have to revisit it later or the results are not what you wanted. When I've made a decision that didn't garner positive results, I've said, "We made the best decision we could based on the facts at the time, but given where we are now as a company and what our goals are, we now need to revisit this decision. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

4 " Techniques for making decision:
- Fill in the gaps (Discuss with domain experts)
- Have a Go-To Team (Team that understands you and are aligned with your core values)
- Pull in the stake holders
- Visualize what your world would look like with that decision
- Take emotions out of the decision (Take time if needed)
- Think in advance about the worst case scenario
- Mitigate the risk of worst case scenario "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

5 " Common Speech Weakners:
- Voicing an opinion by saying, "I might be wrong about this, but...." By starting your sentence this way, you are discrediting your own idea before you even say it.
- Failing to take ownership of your idea by saying "I feel" instead of "I know".
- Making an assertion into a question by raising your voice at the end of your sentence.
- Shrugging or loking down when speaking. This kind of body language makes us seem less confident and capable.
- Communicating a lack of commitment to our statements by allowing our voice to rail off at the end of our sentence. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

6 " Remember, nonverbal communication is extremely important. Be cognisant of your posture, eye contact, and the amount of physical space you take up. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

7 " Back when I was struggling with all of this, my boss saw that I was having difficulty contribution in meetings and noted how very different this was from his experience of me when we met one-on-one. To urge me to speak up more, he began giving me assignments before each meeting. He would call me and say, "Fran in today's meeting, I am going to ask you to give everyone an update on the restructuring". "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

8 " Before you arrive at any networking event, read the industry trade news beforehand Better still, read the trades on a regular basis, Be prepared to discuss the news or ask a question about what you've read. If you're meeting with a specific person, be sure to have checked their Twitter, LinkedIn, and blogs beforehand. This kind of preparation will give you confidence going into a meeting. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

9 " Plant seeds for your future by pursuing an interest or hobby outside of work.
Connect the dots by pairing the skills and information you learn while investing in yourself with people in your network. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

10 " I asked Alicia to think about the people she knew whose work she admired. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

11 " Thinking of others isn't a problem as long as you don't fall into the trap of giving and never asking for anything in return from the people you're networking with. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

12 " A mentor is someone who is willing to give you advice that isn't in their own best interest. It takes a real mentor to put you first. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

13 " What I wish I knew when I asked for a raise in my twenties:
- Remember: the world is not going to end if you get "no" for an answer
- You have succeeded before
- Be confident and keep it positive
- Stop waiting for the perfect moment
- Use "no" to fuel your next steps "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

14 " That is, the more successful a man is, the more likable he becomes. But with a woman, it’s the exact opposite. The more successful and ambitious a woman is, the less likeable she becomes. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

15 " If you take a risk and it doesn't go as planned, welcome to the club. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

16 " If we allow ourselves to become pushovers, then our kindness stops being an asset and becomes a liability. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

17 " Remember to draw a line between being nice in a strong way and simply being a people pleaser.

Nice: Positive, yet honest and straightforward.
People pleaser: Sweeping things under the rug to avoid making waves. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

18 " Once I did find my voice, I saw that it was necessary to speak up in order to be as effective as possible in my role. Yet, many of the women around me still fell into the trap of being seen as ineffective or weak because they never took a vocal stand. No matter how brilliant and impressive these women may have been in one-on-one discussions, not speaking up in meetings hurt their chances of succeeding professionally. When women don't share their ideas with a large number of people, their contributions are easily over looked , and it's difficult for them to be seen as leaders. People naturally want to follow people who take a stand and voice their opinions with confidence. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

19 " You must find time to invest in yourself and your career. This isn't selfish - it will also be good for the company you work for because you'll add extra value. "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate

20 " Before every meeting, I made an active commitment to myself to make at least one comment, in the meeting besides a simple throwaway line like "Yes" or "That's interesting! "

― Fran Hauser , The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career You Love Without Becoming a Person You Hate