Home > Work > Transmetropolitan, Vol. 3: Year of the Bastard
1 " Being a nun wasn't all it was cracked up to be and the sex was shit. "
― Warren Ellis , Transmetropolitan, Vol. 3: Year of the Bastard
2 " By four o'clock, I've discounted suicide in favor of killing everyone else in the entire world instead. "
3 " I can't solve any problems. All I can do is try to make sure people can't avoid noticing them. "
4 " Half the time he seems autistic, the rest of the time he's like a lizard jacked full of lithium and speed. These things do not promote love in most of us. "
5 " You want to know about voting. I'm here to tell you about voting. Imagine you're locked in a huge underground night-club filled with sinners, whores, freaks and unnameable things that rape pitbulls for fun. And you ain't allowed out until you all vote on what you're going to do tonight. You like to put your feet up and watch "Republican Party Reservation". They like to have sex with normal people using knives, guns, and brand new sexual organs you did not even know existed. So you vote for television, and everyone else, as far as your eye can see, votes to fuck you with switchblades. That's voting. You're welcome. "
6 " So this Zealot comes to my door, all glazed eyes and clean reproductive organs, asking me if I ever think about God. So I tell him I killed God. I tracked God down like a rabid dog, hacked off his legs with a hedge trimmer, raped him with a corncob, and boiled off his corpse in an acid bath. So he pulls an alternating-current taser on me and tells me that only the Official Serbian Church of Tesla can save my polyphase intrinsic electric field, known to non-engineers as "the soul." So I hit him. What would you do? "
7 " I want something that'll give me the stamina of a young werewolf, the vision of a shaman, the thoughts of a serial killer and the gentleness of a hungry vampire bat. "
8 " I'm going to shit in your lungs for this. "
