Home > Work > The Upside of Unrequited (Simonverse, #2)
41 " Because that's the thing about change. It's so painfully normal. It's the most basic of all tragedies. "
― Becky Albertalli , The Upside of Unrequited (Simonverse, #2)
42 " Anyway, thanks for saving my butt. Literally.” She shakes her head. “Okay, not my butt.” I giggle. “It’s okay.” “Thanks for saving my labia. "
43 " Like, this whole Molly thing with the secret crushes that go nowhere. I’m over it.” “Oh, you’re over it?” My throat tightens. “Uh, I’m sorry boys don’t like me.” “That is such bullshit, Molly. You don’t even talk to them.” Here we go. Cassie’s soapbox: the fact that I’ve had twenty-six crushes and exactly zero kisses. Apparently, it’s because I need to woman up. If I like a guy, I’m supposed to tell him. Maybe in Cassie’s world, you can do that and have it end in making out. But I’m not so sure it works that way for fat girls. "
44 " It’s strange how you can sometimes still feel self-conscious around people you’ve known your whole life. "
45 " Netflix means not having to suck in your stomach or think of anything smart or adorable to say. It means a whole night of not wondering what people think about you. No alcohol, and no flirtation, and no confusion, and every organ calm and settled. "
46 " It’s that feeling of someone knowing you in all the ways you needed to be known. "
47 " Except, if I'm totally honest, I do believe it. Reid likes me. And I like that he likes me. But I'm not used to this game. It's this totally new way of seeing myself. Like I'm some hazily lit dream girl from a movie. I've never been that girl before. "
48 " I feel like the two negative ends of a magnet. Like there are parts of me that can't come together. "
49 " I mean, that’s how it’s going to be. It’s that easy for Olivia. Maybe this is what life is like for most girls. "
50 " But when you're that pretty, you can date anyone, and people know you picked the geek on purpose. Like, you could have had the hot guy, but you didn't want him. But when you're a fat geek who likes another fat geek, everyone assumes you're settling. "
51 " But you know, there’s an upside here. Because when you spend so much time just intensely wanting something, and then you actually get the thing? It’s magic.” All of a sudden, I feel like crying. In a good way. In the best way. Because I know exactly what she means. It’s butterflies and haziness and heart eyes, but underneath all that, there’s this bass line of I can’t believe this. I can’t believe this is me. I can’t quite articulate the sweetness of that feeling. It’s finding out the door you were banging on is finally unlocked. Maybe it was unlocked the whole time. "
52 " I wish there were a secret signal you could use to communicate: HELLO. I AM OFFICIALLY COOL WITH SILENCE. Not "
53 " there’s something really badass about truly, honestly not caring what people think about you. A lot of people say they don’t care. Or they act like they don’t care. But I think most people care a lot. I know I do. "
54 " But maybe there are always tiny sad pieces inside me, waiting to be recognized and named. Maybe it’s like that for everyone. "
55 " I’M ON THE TOILET AT the 9:30 Club, and I’m wondering how mermaids pee. This isn’t random. There’s a mermaid Barbie attached to the door of the bathroom here. Which is a pretty odd choice for a bathroom mascot. If that’s even a thing. Bathroom mascots. But "
56 " You would matter. That’s the thing. I get into this weird place sometimes where I worry about that. I’ve never told anyone this—not my moms, not even Cassie—but that’s the thing I’m most afraid of. Not mattering. Existing in a world that doesn’t care who I am. It’s this whole other level of aloneness. "
57 " It’s just hard to believe in the concept of Molly-With-a-Boyfriend. "
58 " If someone says I'm sad, or asks me what's wrong, or tells me not to cry, it's like my body hears: NOW CRY. Like a command, even if I'm not actually sad. "
59 " And it's the end of the world and the beginning of the world and we're seventeen. It's an awesome thing. "
60 " Honestly, the secret to impressing people is this: individual portions, packaged in mason jars. I "