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One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production QUOTES

One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production QUOTES

1 " The way an angry Canadian shopper argues with a retail sales associate who believes the customer is always right is like watching two ducks fight. It’s as harmless as two pillows on a bed, and watching is liable to put you to sleep. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

2 " When observed from above the water, a duck moves smooth and without effort. But if you looked underwater, you'd see a paddle wheel, like one found on The Mississippi River in the year 1888, churning and being steered by a drunk Mark Twain. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

3 " I filled my tub with Pekin ducks. Have you ever taken a bath in birds that can swim? Next time, try experiencing it at over 60 miles per hour. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

4 " Ducks swim in water. That's obvious, but do you know why they swim in water? Because I don't keep their pond stocked full of vodka. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

5 " After watching my ducks swim, I started writing poetry using body language. If I could also time travel, I'd go back and ask Wordsworth, "What are words worth? "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

6 " Ducks are practically defenseless, and as a result, they have many predators. There are foxes, coyotes, wolves, raccoons, bobcats, hawks, and Janet Yellen. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

7 " I haven’t eaten anything in 24 hours, but I weigh more today than I did yesterday. The extra mass must be in my brain, which is heavier after watching my ducks happily scrounge for bugs to gobble, and thinking that’s what The Globalists want all men but them to eat by the year 2030. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

8 " I like my duck eggs runny, like Roger Bannister when he broke the four-minute mile barrier. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

9 " Don’t you just hate it when you step in dog poop? Especially if you’re walking with a friend, and as you smell it and the stench keeps pace with you, you begin to wonder if your friend shit his pants. Thankfully, what comes out of a duck’s anus looks more like coffee, and fills your nostrils like yesterday’s news. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

10 " Starbucks coffee tastes like watery duck poop. I mean it probably does, because it’s not like I’ve ever drank something so gross. But I have tried duck poop. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

11 " Why aren’t more news articles written about duck farms? Is it because the end product doesn’t produce obscene violence? It’s true, people do stab each other over spicy chicken sandwiches, but think of the savagery over my eggs that’ll take place when all that’s left in the grocery store is Beyond Meat. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

12 " To collect rainwater on your duck farm, dig a ditch and line it with empty taco shells. It’s not the best solution, but it’s better than the alternative, which is Italian food. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

13 " Have you ever seen how fast ducks can waddle when chased? If I were to ever run a marathon, I'd model my pace on their stride and rhythm. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

14 " I pour my morning coffee like ducks splash in a pond. Is an extended blink a micro nap? That's the thought that crosses my mind when I drive like Helen Keller. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

15 " A coffee table has four legs, but it cannot run. A duck has two legs, but is not considered living room furniture. Or is it? When you buy a sofa from me, you get one for FREE. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

16 " One out of ten dentists agree: This book of duck quotes helps fight Gingivitis. Maybe tomorrow I’ll ask nine more dentists. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

17 " I've never had a spicy chicken sandwich worth getting stabbed over. But that's the kind of organic marketing experience I'd like to bring to duck farming. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

18 " People have been stabbed over spicy chicken sandwiches. The duck farm industry could benefit from that kind of violence to help increase sales. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

19 " Have you ever had a prophetic dream about my duck farm being as successful in the future as The Spicy Chicken Sandwich? No? Well, try harder! For better results, sleep longer. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

20 " A library without books is not a library at all. Well, what is it then? It’s a room full of shelves to keep all your ducks. "

― Jarod Kintz , One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production