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81 " Fear's good. It keeps interesting "
― Melina Marchetta , Saving Francesca
82 " It's like two cultures had a massive fight over hisface and neither won. "
83 " I look at him."It's odious," he says."Detention?" I ask, confused."Huh?"We have no idea what the other is talking about."What's odious?" I ask."O.D.S," he says, pointing to his discman and obviously referring to some dropkick band.Like I really care. "
84 " Just having my own time-out; a bit of self-pity here, a bit of self-loathing there. "
85 " I’m comparing you to . . . rugby and . . . my voice breaking . . . and everything I love but don’t understand.” “To the failures in your life.” “No. I’m comparing you to all the things I love doing best and I just can’t have when I want them. "
86 " If I asked you to stay, would you?” I ask later as we’re standing by his car. “Maybe I would, but I don’t think you’d ask me. But I swear to God that I’ll be on the first plane back if you ever need saving from anything. . . .” I shake my head again. “You go and shake your foundations, Will. I think it’s about time I saved myself. "
87 " I like looking at his face when he speaks. Sometimes he spit, actually he spits all the time, but I think that's passionate. He loves words and he rolls them around in his mouth like a luscious plum, slobbering on the sides, and then he'll use his hands, touching his mouth as if he's taking the words out throwing them to us. "
88 " I so don’t want to be attracted to him, and the fact that I am surprises me. Sometimes when I get home, I convince myself that I’m just romanticizing anyone who’s actually spoken to me, but then I see him the next day and my heart starts beating fast and I can’t really kid myself. "
89 " Sometimes your whole system just shuts down and you wake up in the morning and everything’s black and no matter how much people speak to you and try to talk you out of it and tell you everything’s okay, it doesn’t work. "
90 " I think it's about time to save myself "
91 " I look past them to where Will and his friends are sitting, and he catches my eye for a moment and smiles. It’s a weird smile, but it reaches his eyes and I bottle it. And I put it in my ammo pack that’s kept right next to my soul. The one that holds Mia’s scent and Justine’s spirit and Siobhan’s hope and Tara’s passions. Because if I’m going to wake up one morning and not be able to get out of bed, I’m going to need everything I’ve got to fight this bastard of a disease that could be sleeping inside of me. "
92 " I think it's about time I saved myself "
93 " thirdly is how I feel about you, but more than anything how I feel about me because of you. "
94 " We stay like that for a while. No one tries to analyze it or offer solutions. No one interrupts. Sometimes, momentarily, I’m embarrassed by the whole disclosure, but I realize that I trust these people and I don’t know how or when that happened. "
95 " You chicks get hot and bothered about anything. "
96 " The truth doesn’t set you free, you know. It makes you feel awkward and embarrassed and defense-less and red in the face and horrified and petrified and vulnerable. But free? I don’t feel free. I feel like shit. "
97 " We make weird friends,” I say instead. “I’ve never been into the f-word with people.” “I’m privileged, then? Why me?” He thinks for a moment and then shrugs again. “You’re the realest person I’ve ever known.” “Is that good or bad?” “It’s fucking awful. There’s not much room for bullshit, and you know how I thrive on it. "
98 " And I hate him and love him and curse him and feel sorry for him, all at the same time. "
99 " I think I’m a bit in love with these girls. They make me feel giddy. Like I haven’t a care in the world. Like I’m fearless. "
100 " Thomas Mackee and Jimmy Hailler grasp each other's hands, one of those brothers-in-arms-we-fought-in-Nam-together grips, but outside this room I don't think they relate. "