188
" I didn’t make a nuisance of myself, not until the end, anyway, and I never outstayed my welcome, not while there was still a welcome to be outstayed; but I was kind and sincere and thoughtful and devoted and I remembered things about her and I told her she was beautiful and bought her little presents that usually referred to a conversation we had had recently. None of this was an effort, of course, and none of it was done with any sense of calculation: I found it easy to remember things about her, because I didn’t think about anything else, and I really did think she was beautiful, and I would not have been able to prevent myself from buying her little presents, and I did not have to feign devotion. There was no effort involved. So when one of Charlie’s friends, a girl called Kate, said wistfully one lunchtime that she wished she could find somebody like me, I was surprised and thrilled. Thrilled because Charlie was listening, and it didn’t do me any harm, but surprised because all I had done was act out of self-interest.
And yet this was enough, it seemed, to turn me into someone desirable. Weird "
― Nick Hornby , High Fidelity
191
" You just...you just don't do anything. You get lost in your head, and you sit around thinking instead of getting on with something, and most of the time you think rubbish. You always seem to miss what's really happening. Do you know that expression, 'Time on his hands and himself on his mind'? That's you.
So what should I be doing?
I don't know. Something. Working. Seeing people. Running a scout troop, or running a club even. Something more than waiting for life to change and keeping your options open. You'd keep your options open for the rest of your life if you could. You'll be lying on your deathbed, dying of some smoking-related disease, and you'll be thinking, 'Well at least I've kept my options open. At least I never ended up doing something I couldn't back out of.' And all the time you're keeping your options open, you're closing them off. You're thirty-six and you don't have children. So when are you going to have them? When you're forty? Fifty? Say you're forty, and say your kid doesn't want kids until he's thirty-six. That means you'd have to live much longer than your allotted three-score years and ten just to catch so much as a glimpse of your grandchild. See how you're denying yourself things? "
― Nick Hornby , High Fidelity
194
" ¿Qué fue primero: la música o la tristeza? ¿Me dio por escuchar música porque estaba triste? ¿O es que estaba triste porque escuchaba música? ¿No te convierten todos esos discos en una persona de tendencia melancólica?
Hay quien se preocupa, y mucho, de que los niños pequeños jueguen con armas de fuego, de que los adolescentes vean vídeos en los que la violencia es moneda corriente; nos da miedo que esa esa especie de cultura de la violencia termine por tragárselos como si tal cosa. A nadie le preocupa en cambio que los niños escuchen miles, literalmente miles de canciones que tratan siempre de corazones destrozados, de rechazos y abandonos, de dolor, tristeza, pérdida. Las personas más desgraciadas que yo he conocido, románticamente hablando, son las que tienen un desarrollado gusto por la música pop. Y no sé si la música pop es la causante de esta infelicidad, pero sí tengo muy claro que han escuchado esas canciones infelices desde hace más tiempo del que llevan viviendo una vida más o menos infeliz. Así de claro. "
― Nick Hornby , High Fidelity
195
" And that's the last time we will ever speak, probably. 'No problem': the last words I will ever say to somebody I have been reasonably close to before our lives take different directions. Weird, eh? You spend Christmas at somebody's house, you worry about their operations, you give them hugs and kisses and flowers, you see them in their dressing gown...and then, bang, that's it. Gone forever. And sooner or later there will be another mum, another Christmas, more varicose veins. "
― Nick Hornby , High Fidelity
199
" So what should I be doing?"
"I don't know. Something. Working. Seeing people. Running a scout troop, or running a club even. Something more than waiting for life to change and keeping your options open. You'd keep your options open for the rest of your life, if you could. You'll be lying on your deathbed, dying of some smoking-related disease, and you'll be thinking, 'Well, at least I've kept my options open. At least I never ended up doing something I couldn't back out of.' And all the time you're keeping your options open, you're closing them off." ...
I knew that we nearly got somewhere; I know that if I had any guts I would tell her that she was right, and wise, and that I needed and loved her, and I would have asked her to marry me or something. It's just that, you know, I want to keep my options open, and anyway, there's no time, because she hasn't finished with me yet. "
― Nick Hornby , High Fidelity
200
" It seems to me that if you place music (and books, probably, and films, and plays, and anything that makes you feel) at the centre of your being, then you can’t afford to sort out your love life, start to think of it as the finished product. You’ve got to pick at it, keep it alive and in turmoil, you’ve got to pick at it and unravel it until it all comes apart and you’re compelled to start all over again. Maybe we all live life at too high a pitch, those of us who absorb emotional things all day, and as a consequence we can never feel merely content: we have to be unhappy, or ecstatically, head-over-heels happy, and those states are difficult to achieve within a stable, solid relationship. "
― Nick Hornby , High Fidelity