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41 " The problem with aspirational lists, of course, is that they often skip the point entirely. Instead of helping us grapple with our finitude, they have approximated infinity. With unlimited time and resources, we could do anything, be anyone. We could become more adventurous by jumping out of airplanes, more traveled by visiting every continent, or more cultured by reading the most famous books of all time. With the right list, we would never starve with the hunger of want. But it is much easier to count items than to know what counts. "
― Kate Bowler , No Cure for Being Human: And Other Truths I Need to Hear
42 " We live and we are loved and we are gone. "
43 " I feel a spark of horror each time I remember it: we come undone. "
44 " I look around me and think, there are the choices I've made. The people I've loved. No matter how fleeting this was, I need them to believe everything mattered. This life was enough.But it's not true, of course.Nothing will add up to enough. I wish someone has told me that the end of a life is a complex equation. Years dwindle into months, months into days, and you must count them. All my dreams and bedtimes with a boy in dinosaur pajamas must be squeezed into hours, minutes, seconds.How should I spend them? "
45 " Nothing will exempt me from the pain of being human. "
46 " Everybody pretends that you only die once. But that's not true. You can die a thousand possible futures in the course of a single, stupid life. "
47 " It is a mystery to me why some mere minutes transform into moments, hovering outside of time. And how they ebb and flow, stirring wonder and the ache for more. I know the love of a God who is beyond all wanting, but the more I live, the more I want and want and want. "
48 " All of our masterpieces, ridiculous. All of our striving, unnecessary. All of our work, unfinished, unfinishable. We do too much, never enough, and are done before we've even started.It's better this way. "
49 " Sorry," I continue, "I'm not trying to be a jerk. But everyone seems to be proceeding under the assumption that their luck is guaranteed once they hit... I don't know middle class? No one seems to understand that everyone's life hangs by a thread. "
50 " Money for treatment. My parents and siblings are taking out loans against their homes now and setting retirement ideas aside to help cover what insurance denies. "
51 " The virtues of mass production are seductive. Speed. Productivity. Growth. But the labor my students are preparing for is slow and inefficient. Most of the week will be spent trying to offer kindness to a deacon who never liked you, or weeding heresies out of the Sunday school material you bought online. You'll spend days coming up with enough beauty and truth to fill an hour on Sunday only to receive a dozen comments from parishioners about how much they miss the old pastor on their way out the door. If you want progress, take up running. If you want meaning, run a church. "
52 " We are reminded why the title pastor comes from the word shepherd, because most of Christian ministry will be spent attending to everyday life. My students at the divinity school sign up for the grand cause of joining God in bringing heaven to earth but mostly find themselves fiddling with the sanctuary sound system and trying to get what's-her-face off the church council. "
53 " We worship at the altar of plenty. ... we cling to stories of more-than-enoughness believing the future is full to the brim for all of us. "
54 " The problem with aspirational lists, of course, is that they often skip the point entirely. Instead of helping us grapple with our finitude, they have approximated infinity. "
55 " that now. We are trapped between a past we can’t return to and a future that is uncertain. And it takes guts to live here, in the hard space between "
56 " To so many people, I am no longer just myself. I am a reminder of a thought that is difficult for the rational brain to accept: our bodies might fail at any moment. "
57 " The terrible gift of a terrible illness is that it has, in fact, taught me to live in the moment. Nothing but this day matters: the warmth of this crib, the sound of his hysterical giggling. And when I look closely at my life, I realize that I'm not just learning to seize the day. In my finite life, the mundane has begun to sparkle. The things I love - the things I should love - become clearer, brighter. "
58 " So often we are defined by the troubles we live with, rather than the things we conquer. "
59 " We are a culture racing toward better tomorrows, but suffering is the slow work of attrition. First it costs you casual friends and small talk, then retirement plans and the thrill of being cajoled into new projects. "
60 " Who wants to be confronted with the reality that we are all a breath away from a problem that could alter our lives completely? A friend with a very sick child said it best: I'm everyone's inspiration and no one's friend. "