63
" The drive seemed both an eternity and a microsecond. When we drove up the sweeping driveway to Q’s stunning home, he kissed my temple, murmuring, “You’re safe.”
The two little words shot deep into my heart, irrevocably changing me. They opened the floodgates, and everything I knew, disappeared. Everything I had been, became nothing. The Tess who loved Brax, who fought to escape, vanished. She wasn’t worthy of Q’s protection. Wasn’t worthy of being rescued by a man who killed for her.
Q was right: I was safe with him. He made it so simple. I couldn’t comprehend how I ran before. I ran from Q’s safety, and monsters found me in the dark. "
― Pepper Winters , Tears of Tess (Monsters in the Dark, #1)
69
" Q’s face twisted; he captured my face between hot hands. “What are you?” he clipped, face hard and unreadable.
The question anchored me and I looked into his pale ferocious eyes. I knew the answer he wanted. “I’m yours.”
He sucked in a heavy breath, body jerking. “Say it again, but not in English.”
Q intoxicated me. My lips parted, and I wanted to stay captured by him, forever. An ancient connection linked us together. I looked into his soul—it churned with agony and demons, but he wasn’t evil.
Q dropped his gaze to my lips. “Je suis à toi.” Something feral heated his features; he pressed his mouth against mine in one fast kiss. “It means, I am yours.”
My breath stuttered as power sliced, deep and fast, igniting broken parts of me with sparks. His allure, his power, all magnified to fist around my stomach. In the dark recess of my brain, I translated his words to him being mine. The power trip the little words gave was indescribable.
No wonder he wanted me to say it. I was drunk on them. He was mine. Mine.
What life did Q live, needing to hear such a strong affirmation? What ghosts haunted him?
Q tightened his fingers, biting into my jaw. “Say it.”
With his command, I fumbled into the victim I was, the rape survivor, the slave. The brief sense of ownership left me bereft.
Q twisted my nipple under the wet material of my bra. His cruelty reddened my skin and fight skittered into yielding. He sent me reeling into needful and damaged. I’d been so close to finding strength, but he took it away in an instant.
Fresh tears spilled as I whispered, “Je suis à toi.”
Q sighed heavily, resting his forehead on mine. “Will you run again? Will you leave the one man who wants you above all others? Leave his protection?” His voice wavered with regret, resignation, as if he expected me to run, and already suffered loneliness.
My eyes popped wide; I shook my head. “No, I won’t run again.”
He looked with half-hooded eyes. “How can you be so sure? Don’t I scare you? Repulse you?”
He never repulsed me, and fear where Q was concerned was an aphrodisiac. But I couldn’t tell him. “I will never escape. Je suis à toi. "
― Pepper Winters , Tears of Tess (Monsters in the Dark, #1)
71
" I’m sorry!” I shouted, sucking in large, gulping breaths as something fractured. I heaved as sadness, self-pity, and lostness asphyxiated. “You hurt me, you torment me—” Sobs stopped my words; I wrapped arms around myself. “But I need you!” I couldn’t do this. I can’t!
Q didn’t offer comfort; he didn’t give me what I needed—he stood there with his aura of power and ruthlessness, watching me dissolve. Where had the man gone who carried me upstairs? That was the man I needed. Not this bastard. This owner.
Q crouched, trying to unlatch my arms from round my ribcage, but I fought him and huddled in the corner. Blonde hair tangled around me, offering protection from his livid gaze.
“Je suis un salaud,” he muttered, pulling me into his lap. His suit oozed with liquid as he leaned against the wall, rocking me. I wanted to agree, he was a bastard, but the ache in his voice hurt me deep. He truly believed it, on a much deeper level. "
― Pepper Winters , Tears of Tess (Monsters in the Dark, #1)
73
" The moment his hands massaged, I cracked again. Wracking sobs exploded from my chest and I doubled over with pain. Not from the rape, or Q’s anger, but because of his touch. No one touched me so tenderly. Never had my parents cuddled or offered comfort in their arms. I grew up never knowing how to hug or kiss or love. Brax came along, and with his sweetness, helped heal me. Even with his tender heartedness, he never just held me—never saw the real me or washed or tended.
It had taken being kidnapped, and sold to a man who didn’t want me, to show how much my existence lacked. Q shattered my walls with his uncouth ways. How could I ever go back to a life where my senses lived in limbo? Where no one cared enough to kill for me?
Q stopped washing my hair, gathering me tighter to him. I crushed against his wet, suited chest, inhaling his unique scent.
He let me cry and didn’t reprimand or control. He offered comfort in silence. Lips pressed my forehead, whispering, “Je suis ici,” over and over. I’m here. I’m here. "
― Pepper Winters , Tears of Tess (Monsters in the Dark, #1)
75
" Pressing his forehead against my cheek, wet hair mingled with mine. “Let me make you forget. Let me give you a new memory, esclave.”
“His purr hitched my breathing, and happiness sharpened to need. My body wanted him to replace the agony of Brute. Q wouldn’t hurt me. Not like those men.
I nodded infinitesimally.
Q’s breathing turned harsh, lowering his hand. Agonisingly slowly, he touched my leg, avoiding the lash marks, stroking reverently. Inch by inch, he made his way up my inner thigh, until exploring fingers found my heat.
I jolted as he circled my entrance. More tears erupted, but he kissed them away, adding pressure to his hold, keeping me still. “Écarté pour moi.” Open for me. "
― Pepper Winters , Tears of Tess (Monsters in the Dark, #1)
76
" Pressing his forehead against my cheek, wet hair mingled with mine. “Let me make you forget. Let me give you a new memory, esclave.” His purr hitched my breathing, and happiness sharpened to need. My body wanted him to replace the agony of Brute. Q wouldn’t hurt me. Not like those men.
I nodded infinitesimally.
Q’s breathing turned harsh, lowering his hand. Agonizingly slowly, he touched my leg, avoiding the lash marks, stroking reverently. Inch by inch, he made his way up my inner thigh, until exploring fingers found my heat.
I jolted as he circled my entrance. More tears erupted, but he kissed them away, adding pressure to his hold, keeping me still. “Écarté pour moi.” Open for me. "
― Pepper Winters , Tears of Tess (Monsters in the Dark, #1)
