The Devil Wears Black QUOTES

1 " I think I better head to bed. Who won?" I squinted at the board. It was blurry, the little pieces swimming around it like they were chasing one another. I hiccupped again. "Me?"

"Actually, you owe me two thousand dollars and a house on Tennessee Avenue." Katie laughed, starting to remove the Scottie dog, top hat, and thimble from the board. I yawned, my eyes flickering shut as I took spontaneous one-second naps between blinks. Somewhere in the back of my head, I realized I was being a mess, not at all the brilliant, responsible fiancé Chase wanted me to be. Screw him. I owed him nothing. As long as his family was having fun.

"I hope you like fixer-uppers and accept coupons, Katie, because I'm broke as all hell," I snorted out.

"That's all right. It's just a game." Katie folded the board and tucked it back into the box as she hummed to herself. She was so agreeable and docile. The opposite of her older brother. Almost like he'd hogged every drop of ferociousness in their DNA pool before he was born.

"Yeah, well, I'm flat-out broke in real life too." I snickered.

Time to go to bed, Miss Hot Mess Express.

I stood up on wobbly feet. My knees felt like jelly, and there was a strange pressure behind my eyes. Knowing I'd be coming face-to-face with Chase made me break out in hives. I'd tried to postpone our reunion as much as I could, hoping --praying, really--he'd fall asleep before I got back to the room.

"Not for long." Lori laughed.

I laughed too. Then paused. Then frowned. "Wait, how do you mean?"

"Well"--Lori offered me a one-shouldered shrug, picking nonexistent lint from her dress pants as Katie put the Monopoly box away--"you're going to marry Chase, honey. And Chase is ... well endowed."

Katie choked on her soda, while I used every ounce of my self-control in order to not break into giggles. "Oh, Lori, you have no idea, "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

2 " These two had the sexual chemistry of a tampon and a ketchup stain together. I couldn’t fathom how she didn’t see it. Madison was fire, and Ethan was . . . what the fuck was he, anyway?
Not water. Not earth. He was a shadow. A by-product of something else. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

3 " Your horns are showing, Mr. Black."

"That," I whispered into her mouth, catching her lower lip between my teeth and tugging, speaking low enough our audience couldn't hear, "is because for you, I'm always horny. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

4 " Cross my heart and hope to die." He put a hand on his chest mockingly.

"At least our hopes are aligned. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

5 " Chase: I bet you're still thinking about that kiss.

Maddie: I chugged bleach as soon as I got back to the office. It helped, a little. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

6 " I wanted to pull Becky’s, Berta’s, and Mom’s guts out of their a-holes and make trendy scarves out of them. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

7 " Hiraeth: a homesickness for a home you can’t return to or that never was. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

8 " I was just wondering if . . .” His eyes ran down my cleavage in the dress, and a smirk twisted his lips. Like he’d found his footing. I needed him to do that. Find his footing. Talk. “If?” I tried to keep my voice neutral. “If I could be the lucky bastard to destroy this masterpiece with my teeth while half-drunk and fully in love with you on your wedding night. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

9 " Bull. Fucking. Shit. He makes you comfortable.” “What’s wrong with comfortable?” “Comfortable would never set you on fire.” “Maybe I don’t want to burn.” “We all want to burn, Mad. It is dangerous, ergo, we want it. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

10 " She smelled of flowers and coconut and my potential demise. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

11 " And remember our flower rule: if it doesn’t make you grow or blossom—let it go. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

12 " I looked at Madison like she was a piñata full of surprises and orgasms I wanted to burst. With my dick-shaped bat. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

13 " Death is no longer an obscure idea. It is real and it is waiting, so you grab life by the balls. When you go through the horror of seeing someone you love die and still manage to wake up the next day to tie your shoelaces, to shove a tasteless breakfast down your throat, to breathe, you realize survival trumps tragedy. Always. It’s a primal instinct. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

14 " I bowed my head down, plastering my forehead to hers, breathing her in. I closed my eyes. We both knew there was not an ounce of romance in that moment. It was a pure this-planet-is-crazy-and-the-human-condition-is-trash moment. It was an end-of-the-world moment, and there wasn’t anywhere else I’d rather be. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

15 " I did as I was told, smoothing my hand across the lush fabric of the Moonflower. I’d named the dress design after the white flower, which looked like a long dress midtwirl when it opened. But there was a catch that made me insist on the name—the moonflower only opened at night. It blossomed in the dark. Sven had said to call it something that reminded me of myself. Nothing reminded me of myself more than blossoming in the arms of darkness. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

16 " I’d looked at postcollege Amber like a new,
shiny, limited-edition car. She’d raised my stock and seemed like a good addition to my life at the time. I looked at Madison like she was a piñata full of surprises and 0rgasms I wanted to burst. With my dick-shaped bat. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

17 " When the nights get cold, the memory of your ex burns hotter. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

18 " What had I ever done to karma to deserve this lubeless ass fucking? "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

19 " He’s fine,” I clipped. “So are you.” The driver grinned. “I’m going to smoke your eyes like beef jerky if you as much as look at her that way again,” Chase groaned. It was the first time he’d spoken since we’d gotten in the car. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black

20 " the new dent in my heart, the shape of his iron fist. "

― L.J. Shen , The Devil Wears Black