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The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality QUOTES

The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality QUOTES

1 " I don't expect to have a fully verified story of how Jo's disorder developed, but I don't think that historical accuracy is as important as what I call "emotional truth." People attach different levels of significance to the same events. No two participants in any event remember it in exactly the same way. A single broken promise, for example, among thousands of promises kept, might not be remembered by a parent, but may never be forgotten by the child who was disappointed. (34) "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

2 " The accuracy of my memories, whether things happened exactly the way that the personalities remember, doesn't really matter. If my memory, combined with the memories of the other personalities, provides some coherent past, then that is far better than the blankness I have. Whatever inaccuracies may occur because of the passage of time or because of the colored intensity of "emotional truth" harm no one. All that matters is that I gain a firm grasp on what is real. (165) "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

3 " Why didn't I feel that I belonged to my parents? How early could I have known that I was not right? I think it has always been part of me. Can a newborn sense her parents' disappointment and feelings of frustration at not being able to change the unchangeable? "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

4 " Jo tried to think about her suspicion that Lynn liked her. She figured that Lynn was nice to her because she was a patient. Jo's mother had shown her what it meant to have a professional mask. The times Jo saw her mother at work in the lab, busy and efficient as she drew blood and marked vials. Nancy smiled warmly at the patients, ready with a sympathetic comment. If a patient or a doctor called Nancy at home, she immediately became the caring professional, no matter what had been happening before the phone rang. When Lynn hung up after an evening phone call from Missy, Jo suspected that Lynn resumed screaming at her husband or kids. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

5 " The Karen personality was created when Jo was nine and her mother said once too often, "Why can't you be like your cousin Karen?" Jo's internal Karen was the perfect mimic of her cousin, and fulfilled Nancy's demand that the child be neat and organized. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

6 " When I was with my mother, I sometimes thought of myself of a trophy—something to be flaunted before friends. When out of public view, I sat on the shelf ignored and forgotten. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

7 " When I was with my mother, I sometimes thought of myself as a trophy-something to be flaunted before friends. When out of public view, I sat on the shelf, ignored and forgotten. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

8 " The little girl's dependency on her father made [his] abuse more insidious. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

9 " More than one personality was created in the hope of being the daughter Nancy could consistently love. More than one new personality was created in response to Mother's unexpected fury. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

10 " Joan Frances says her mother is perfect someone she models herself after. She is tortured because she is disobeying her mother by seeing me. Nancy reportedly told her daughter the other day, "For Mother's Day, I want a happy girl who realizes how lucky she is." Since Mother's Day is a couple of days away, it would take a miracle to deliver that present. And so the pressure and guilt continue to grow. But Joan Frances's regular calls home make me sure that Nancy offers limited support and acceptance, as well as her dose of unrealistic expectations. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

11 " The accuracy of my memories, whether things happened exactly the way that the personalities remember, doesn't really matter. If my memory, combined with the memories of the other
personalities, provides some coherent past, then that is far better than the blankness I have. Whatever inaccuracies may occur because of the passage of time or because of the colored intensity of "emotional truth" harm no one. All that matters is that I gain a firm grasp on what is real. The memories of the total entity, accurate or not, are providing me a handle. I must have some background to adequately explain where I am now. I must have a base from which to build an unfragmented future. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

12 " Somehow the disorder hooks into all kinds of fears and insecurities in many clinicians. The flamboyance of the multiple, her intelligence and ability to conceptualize the disorder, coupled with suicidal impulses of various orders of seriousness, all seem to mask for many therapists the underlying pain, dependency, and need that are very much part of the process. In many ways, a professional dealing with a multiple in crisis is in the same position as a parent dealing with a two-year-old or with an adolescent's acting-out behavior. (236) "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

13 " The Flock have come a long way in their acceptance of this, and when a professional refused to deal with them in a straightforward manner and, in fact, manipulated and deceived them in return-they rebelled fiercely but self-protectively. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

14 " Nancy was as proud as she was critical of her younger daughter. She spoke glowingly about the precocious little girl who said her first sentence at seven months and walked at ten months. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

15 " To treat my first multiple, as to raise my first child, I had to commit myself deeply to the experience in order to tolerate the uncertainty, fear, pain, and intensity. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

16 " I attempted to be clear and straightforward in my approach to Dr Tate, deferring to his medical expertise and stating my desire merely to be helpful. Renee and Joan Frances, in turn, were clear and straightforward about their needs in a way that was new for them. Yet we were seen as manipulative multiple and puppet therapist. Renee had probably never been less manipulative in her life than when she was trying to reason with Dr. Tate. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

17 " I wish I had a magic wand to make things better, but therapy doesn't work that way. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

18 " Now that she had the diagnosis to explain her sense of reality, she sorted some of the chaotic jumble of thoughts and memories.

"I'd feel funny having 'daydreamed' my way through whole seasons," Jo said, "but then I'd hear someone say, 'Time flies,' or 'How did it get to be three o'clock already?' and I'd think that everyone was like me. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

19 " It is this honest connection behveen two human beings that, in the end, makes what we endured together understandable and meaningful. "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality

20 " as my understanding of and competence in treating the disorder have grown, multiple personality has come to seem, though still horrendous, less unique and incomprehensible, and thus more manageable "

― , The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality