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The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1) QUOTES

The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1) QUOTES

1 " How is that weird?” Dark the First asked incredulously. “Literally everyone does it. Literally.”
“I really wish you’d stop saying literally,” Dark the Second said. “I literally don’t think you understand what that word means. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

2 " Or not,” I said as I ground my teeth. “I like to masticate by myself.” “And you’re so good at it,” Gary said. “The up and down motions of your… jaw. And then, upon completion, you swallow. Right, Sam? You swallow, don’t you?” “Of course I do,” I said, confused. What the hell were we talking about now? “I always swallow when I finish. What am I supposed to do? Spit it back out? "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

3 " ...I’m sorry I made an oath. I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. And I’m sorry that I can’t break it. But you have to believe me that it’s always been you. I promise. I promise." His voice cracked and my hands shook. "I promise, because when I look upon these stars, there is nothing I wish for more than you. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

4 " Please let it be known that from this day forward my working title for the business is now 'Queen of the Fuck Palace! "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

5 " Look. This has been… fun.” Lie. This had been nerve-racking and I needed to go masturbate. “But I have to go. I’ve got stuff to do before I head out again.” Masturbate. “Wizard stuff. Like… secret wizard stuff.” Masturbate. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

6 " The color of your dress really brings out the extraordinary paleness of your skin tone. Are you unwell? Dying, perhaps? "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

7 " No cursing,” I scolded him. “You’re a knight. You don’t get to do that. You gave up that right when you swore your oath to the King. You have to lead by example now. So say stuff like ‘fudge toast’ and ‘mothercrackers’ instead of ‘shit whore’ and ‘fuck storm. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

8 " It's you," I said, not able to look away. "It's how I feel when I'm with you. How I think I've always felt. You're my lightning-struck heart. It doesn't matter about the cornerstone. It doesn't matter about who I am or who you are. Not to me. I think it would have always been this way for me. Even if we had never escaped the slums. Ever since the beginning. Ever since I've known you, you've struck my heart, and now I have to let you go because you're not mine to keep. I need someone that I can be strong for. But I need someone who can also be strong for me. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

9 " I’m a dragon, and maybe if you’re lucky, I’ll be dragon my balls across your face later. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

10 " Good-bye, self-esteem and fuzzy feelings. It was so nice to make your acquaintance. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

11 " I wish I could find that one person made for me so that way I can show them why I was made for them. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

12 " We went into the Dark Woods and I almost had to get gay fairy married again and now I feel really bad and Ryan got bad-touched by trees and Fairy King Dimitri was cryptic and annoying and apparently has a size kink. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

13 " found out I really hated dancing with strangers who were trying to get up in my business, so I filled in the silence with vivid descriptions of how we’d have at least ten kids and that I knew a spell that would allow us to get pregnant so we could take turns just popping out the ass babies. I’m pretty sure a couple of them all but ran by the time we’d finished. I waved after them. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

14 " I’m going to have to work out even more now tomorrow to make up for all the potatoes and bread. Okay. I feel bad. That was a lie. I’m not going to work out at all. That sounds just awful. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

15 " I winked at myself in the mirror and then realized that’s what douchebags did, so I vowed to never do it again. I "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

16 " Hi, my name is Ryan Foxheart. Oh no! There’s danger afoot! Let me pull out my sword and pose.” I mimed pulling a sword from my side and cocked an eyebrow. “Notice how dashing I am. And immaculate. And today, my hair is parted on the right. Wink. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

17 " Gary snorted. When he did, little pink and purple sparkles shot out his nose. Being a unicorn is awesome like that. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

18 " I squawked attractively. Okay. That was a lie. There is no way to squawk attractively. It was rather unattractive. Arms flailing, legs kicking. It was just awful. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

19 " The unicorn stared at him. Then, “Gary.” “Your name is Gary,” Sam said. “Yes.” “Ah. That’s… not very unicorn-like.” Gary scowled. “And what is unicorn-like?” Sam shrugged. “I don’t know. Like Princess Moon Cloud or Ethereal Tear or Star Shine. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)

20 " Are they speaking in code?” Mom asked Dad, trying to be quiet but failing miserably. “I don’t know,” Dad said. “I don’t speak wizard.” “Neither do I. I feel like we’ve failed as parents.” “Nah,” Dad said easily. “Look at him. He’s adorable and knows how to put on his own pants. We did good. "

― T.J. Klune , The Lightning-Struck Heart (Tales From Verania, #1)