Home > Work > Four to Score (Stephanie Plum, #4)
1 " I always wanted to eat with a Negro,” Grandma said.Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney-assed old white woman,” Lula said. “So I guess this works out good. "
― Janet Evanovich , Four to Score (Stephanie Plum, #4)
2 " Some men go a lifetime and never have their kid blow up a car, but I have a daughter who's knocked off three cars and burned down a funeral home. Maybe that's some kind of record. "
3 " Cupcake, your middle name is trouble. "
4 " I was going to go to church, but I decided to get doughnuts instead. "
5 " THE NOTE said the first clue was "in the big one." I looked at the jumble of letters that followed, and I saw no pattern. Not such a surprise, since I was missing the puzzle chromosome and couldn't do puzzles designed for nine-year-olds. "
6 " Life is about survival of the fittest, and Jersey is producing the master race. "
7 " I always know it's Sunday because I wake up feeling apologetic. That's one of the cool things about being a Catholic . . . it's a multifaceted experience. If you lose the faith, chances are you'll keep the guilt, so it isn't as if you've been skunked altogether. "
8 " Be still my heart. "
9 " No Ranger in sight. That's because he's in the wind. You can't see the wind. Or maybe the wind went home to watch Tuesday night fights. "
10 " If Mickey Mouse could fly, he'd be Donald Duck. "
11 " Concentrate on doing the job, not the fear. "
12 " Even more bothersome was the fact that Eddie Kuntz's napkin was moving on his lap without benefit of hands. My first inclination was to shout "Snake!" and shoot, but probably that wouldn't hold up in court. Besides, as much as I disliked Eddie Kuntz, I could sort of identify with a man who got a stiffie over banana cream pie. "
13 " Lennie Smullenski and Anthony Zuck bake the goodies in the back room in big steel ovens and troughs of hot oil. Clouds of flour and sugar sift onto table surfaces and slip under foot. And lard is transferred daily from commercial sized vats directly to local butts. "
14 " As much as I disliked Eddie Kuntz, I could sort of identify with a man who got a stiffie over banana cream pie. "
15 " I always know it's Sunday because I wake up feeling apologetic. That's one of the cool things about being a Catholic … it's a multifaceted experience. "
16 " she wrapped her head in a towel and croaked." That sounded reasonable to me … except for the paring knife with blood and pieces of hair stuck to it. Lula bent at the waist and examined the towel, wrapped turban style. "Must have been a good clonk she took. Lots of blood." Usually when people die their bodies evacuate and the smell gets bad fast. Mrs. Nowicki didn't smell dead. Mrs. Nowicki smelled like Jim Beam. Carl and I were both registering this oddity, looking at each other sideways when Mrs. Nowicki opened one eye and fixed it on Lula. "YOW!" Lula yelled, jumping back a foot, knocking into Sally. "Her eye popped open!" "The better "
17 " How'd you get her to leave?" "Told her I was gonna spend the next twelve hours ruining you for all other men, and so she might as well go home." I could feel the heat rush to my face. Ranger gave me the wolf smile. "I lied about it being tonight," he said. "
18 " Morelli looked dazed. "What good is a gun without bullets?" "It's good for scaring people. Or you can hit people with it. Or you can use it to break windows … or crack walnuts. "
19 " I wanted to marry Aladdin so I'd get to fly on his magic carpet. So you can see that we were coming from different places. "
20 " Fifteen minutes later I was dressed in four-inch FMPs (short for "fuck-me pumps," because when you walked around in them you looked like Whorehouse Wonder Bitch). I shimmied into a low-cut black knit dress that was bought with the intent of losing five pounds, gunked up my eyes with a lot of black mascara and beefed up my cleavage by stuffing Nerf balls into my bra. Ranger was parked on Roebling, half a block from the funeral home. He didn't turn when I pulled to the curb, but I saw his eyes on me in the rearview mirror. He was smiling when I slid "