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1 " Would you like a paddle to help you up Shit Creek in your douchecanoe?” Catcher "
― Katie Ashley , Drop Dead Sexy
2 " Although it wasn’t in the Ten Commandments, I’m pretty sure, “Thou shalt not sext in the house of God,” was pretty high up there on the list of no-nos. "
3 " I'd been emotionally slutty by revealing too much about my relationship goals. "
4 " Oh shit. He was serious. And he wanted me. Yes, me, The eternally single woman. "
5 " If you had to put my love life into a genre, it would probably be horror. By the same token, I’m not even sure that the master of scary shit, Stephen King, could adequately express it on paper. "
6 " There’s not just a spark between us. There’s a full-on raging inferno. Don’t put it out. "
7 " Oh my God, you’ve got me talking to your dick.” “Don’t feel bad. I talk to him a lot.” I "
8 " It wasn’t often that you got to meet your real life hero, but I had been blessed to have him for a father. "
9 " Okay, so I was lying through my teeth. I wasn’t just desperate to be boned. I was even more desperate to have someone to call my own. For spooning while sleeping in on Saturday mornings. For mundane conversations over homemade chicken and dumplings. For arguing over what to watch on television—football or Lifetime. For shuttling our children between sports practice and dance lessons. For all the little things that made average lives extraordinary. "
10 " Considering how men felt about their manhood, this would be like hitting the Powerball in the penis lottery. "
11 " My raging libido instantly shriveled at the sight of what had to be the reunion crew of Deliverance. Instantly the tune of Dueling Banjos started to play in my head. No, no, no, this couldn’t be happening. I could not bring myself to go home with a hillbilly, regardless of the state of tumbleweeds blowing through my nether regions. It was time I turned around, tucked my tail between my legs, and got the hell out of there. "