5
" But at some point in our thirties, or at the latest at forty, this game gets increasingly dull. Up till now everything has worked so well; we can give people the impression that we are “cool” or “witty” or “the serious, reflective student.” Up till now we have fixated on this self-image and led others to fixate on it. It was a help in demarcating our own ego from the environment. But the more such ego boundaries harden and the more anyone identifies with this sort of self-image and tries to maintain it at any price, the more clearly we also see the other side of the coin. If someone has kept busy up to the age of forty cultivating this image, it will be very difficult to change. At the same time it becomes increasingly clearer that the whole thing no longer adds up. What was pleasure becomes a burden. That is why this moment in the middle of life harbors the great opportunity—as difficult as it is—to reflect critically on what has previously been achieved, to change, to become more mature, wiser, and more integrated. Now the following words of Jesus take on a here-and-now flavor: “But when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish to go” (John 21:18). "
― Richard Rohr , The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective
