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Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism! QUOTES

Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism! QUOTES

1 " I love the Olympics, because they enable people from all over the world to come together and--regardless of their political or cultural differences--accuse each other of cheating. "

― Dave Barry , Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism!

2 " You know those telemarketing people who always call you at dinnertime? I’m talking about the ones who never come right out and say they’re selling something. Lately, they’ve been using the bizarre term “courtesy call” to describe what they’re doing. “Mr. Barry,” they’ll say, “this is just a courtesy call to do you the courtesy of interrupting your dinner so I can ask you this question: Would you like to save fifty percent or more on your long-distance phone bill?” I always say no. I tell them that I WANT a big long-distance bill, and that I often place totally unnecessary calls to distant continents just to jack it up. I tell them that if my long-distance bill is not high enough to suit me, I deliberately set fire to a pile of cash. Then I hang up. But of course this does not stop them. The next night, they call again. That’s how courteous they are. "

― Dave Barry , Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism!