Happy-Go-Lucky QUOTES

1 " Lisa, you’re a natural,” Lonnie said. “OK, Mike, now you give it a try.” I looked around, confused. “Excuse me?” He handed me the .38. “You came here to shoot, didn’t you?” I accepted the gun, and from then until the time we left, my name was Mike, which was more than a little demoralizing. Not getting the “Wait a minute—the David Sedaris?” I have come to expect when meeting someone was bad enough, but being turned into a Mike, of all things? I thought of the time a woman approached me in a hotel lobby. “Pardon me,” she said, “but are you here for the Lions Club meeting?” That’s the Mike of organizations. "

― David Sedaris , Happy-Go-Lucky

3 " Now I think that guys who wear baseball caps with their sunglasses perched on the brims have guns, if—and this is important—the lenses of those sunglasses are mirrored or fade from orange to yellow, like a tequila sunrise. "

― David Sedaris , Happy-Go-Lucky

5 " At twenty-two, you are built for poverty and rejection. And you know why? Because you're good-looking. You might not realize it this morning, but thirty years from now, you will pull out pictures of yourself taken on this day and think, Why did nobody tell me I was so fucking attractive? You maybe can't see it now because you're comparing yourself to the person next to you, or two rows up. But you are stunning. "

― David Sedaris , Happy-Go-Lucky

7 " I left the store determined that when and if it was ever my turn and I was the author seated at that table, I was going to engage people until they grew old, or at least thirsty. "Well, all right, then," they'd say, looking past me for the nearest exit, "let me let you go."
I would see them until they wilted. "

― David Sedaris , Happy-Go-Lucky

9 " For, rather than thinking of his death, I will be thinking of the story of his death, so much so that after his funeral Amy will ask, "Did I see you taking notes during the service?"
There'll be no surprise in her voice. Rather, it will be the way you might playfully scold a squirrel: "Did you just jump up from the deck and completely empty that bird feeder?"
The squirrel and me—it's in our nature, though maybe not forever. For our natures, I have just recently learned from my father, can change. Or maybe they're simply revealed, and the dear, cheerful man I saw that afternoon at Springmoor was there all along, smothered in layers of rage and impatience that burned away as he blazed into the homestretch. "

― David Sedaris , Happy-Go-Lucky