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" The value of the student’s question is supreme. The best initial response to a question is not to answer it, per se, but to validate it, protect it, support it, and make a
space for it. Like a blossom just emerging, a question is vulnerable and delicate. A
direct answer can extinguish a question if you’re not careful. But if you nourish the
blossom, it will grow and give fruit in the form of insight as well as more questions.
In short, a question needs to be nurtured more than answered. It should be given
center stage, admired, relished, embraced, and sustained. "
― , Tinkering: Kids Learn by Making Stuff
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" This MomentThis straining, messy, awful,moment in time Is perfect. Push aside your agenda for a second and you’ll find perfection bursting out of its confines.This moment brings truth,illuminates weaknesses,and builds power and wisdomto make us stronger.There are numerous signs, here and now,that teach so profoundly,that validate the strengths we hold inside,that let us know who we really loveand what we need to say.If we can make ourselves look at these signs,at the whole picture, at how it fits together, at where our path is leading, we might discover how to turn our direction,So this moment can rise upriding a cloud of joy,and heal. "
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" The anger response, like the fear response, is a frequent target for repression. Imagine a 6-year-old girl who is angry at her 10-year-old brother for teasing her. In response, she might make an angry face, yell at her brother, and strike out at him with her fists. It’s an instinctual, energizing reaction designed to protect her from danger. Someone is violating her sense of well-being, and she’s afraid that if she doesn’t stop the intruder, she’ll get hurt.
“A wise parent would validate the girl’s anger — it’s infuriating to be teased — and help her find a verbal rather than a physical way to express it. ‘You are very mad at your brother for teasing you,’ says this model parent, ‘I would be, too. Tell him in words how angry you feel. He needs to know.’ This way, the girl can protect herself from her brother and purge herself of her anger without having to resort to physical violence. Her self-protective anger remains intact. It has simply been given a ore ‘civilized’ form of expression. "
― , The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life