" Think about it: if I’m sure I’m right, there is little hope of seeing where I am failing. So I keep trying the same old things—the same lectures, for example, and the same punishments. And I keep getting the same outcomes: others with problems. On the one hand, I hate it, but on the other hand, I get my justification, which is what I most want when I’m in the box. My need for justification blinds me to all kinds of possibilities. Even to the obvious ones. "

― The Arbinger Institute , The Anatomy of Peace: Resolving the Heart of Conflict