" It’s strange the way your first relationships – or situationships – can fuck with you just enough to linger for years. Our relationships with these stories can be even more toxic and damaging than the people who inspired them. Because some idiot made you feel worthless, theirs is the legacy you’ve chosen to let define you, to gauge your merit by. Every guy morphs into that guy, and every “challenge” is another chance to fix past failures – as if the validation of another person would ever be enough. And it takes years for you to realize that you will never be happy until you let this go.

You can’t force self-worth, and you can’t rush emotional recovery, and you can’t hurry through breaking patterns you’ve kept in place to keep you safe. "

― Ruby Tandoh , Do What You Want