" There's been an accident. I had Mr. Loosey on the table, and I was gonna get him dressed, and then I had to go fix the thermostat, and when I got back to Mr. Loosey, I noticed he was missing his..um, private part. I don't know how this could happen. One minute it was there, and the next minute it was gone."
-Louie Moon, mortician's assistant "

― Janet Evanovich , Two for the Dough (Stephanie Plum, #2)