QUOTE : Empathize with his negative thoughts. For example, say: “I’ll bet you feel that nobody knows what it’s like to be scared that you can’t pull this project off. And I’ll bet that you’re upset because you think we’re all feeling let down by you. What’s more, I’ll bet you feel that nobody can possibly understand how hard it is to deal with all the stuff that’s happening in your life.” Now watch the magic. Because you’re empathizing with Art’s emotions, you will eliminate his mirror neuron gap and cause him to feel understood by and connected to you. And there’s the first paradox: By saying explicitly that you know he feels that nobody understands, you’ll make him realize that you do understand.