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101 " It's not the sound itself that bothers me; it's just the fact that it's loud. The loud sounds make it impossible to hear the soft sounds and the soft sounds are the ones you have to be afraid of. "
― Katja Millay , The Sea of Tranquility
102 " I need to know that there even is such a thing as okay, or maybe not just okay, maybe even good, and it's out there and we just haven't found it yet. There's got to be a happier ending than this, here. There's got to be a better story. Because we deserve one. You deserve one. Even if it doesn't end with you coming back to me. --Josh "
103 " I love you, Sunshine, and I don't give a shit whether you want me to or not. "
104 " Depends on how badly you want it. It's worth whatever you're willing to pay for it. "
105 " Seriously, Josh. What the hell? "
106 " I wished that my hand would work again," I tell him when he climbs in after me. it was my first wish and the only one that mattered."I wished my mother was here tonight, which is stupid, because it's an impossible wish." He shrugs and turns to me, drowning the smile that cracks me every time."It's not stupid to want to see her again.""It wasn't so much that I wanted to see her again, " he says, looking at me with the depth of more than seventeen years in his eyes. "I wanted her to see you. "
107 " Girls always want to change the rules in the middle of the game. "
108 " Not my fault you're distractingly pretty. "
― Katja Millay
109 " What did you see when you died?" He has that tenative half smile, like he's almost embarrassed by what he's saying. "Because I'm guessing it wasn't the Sea of Tranquility."And when I look at him, I'm not so sure it wasn't.“Where did you go?" His voice drops just slightly and loses even the suggestion of a smile.He's watching me like he's not sure he's allowed to ask the question, and he's not even sure he wants the answer. I can almost see his grandfather's words and Josh's doubts about them swimming in his head. On every side of me are the lights and the tools and the wood and the boots and the boy I want to see forever. And if the my Sea of Tranquility were real, it would be this place, here, with him.I don't say anything right away, because I just want one minute to look at his face before I give him my last secret.And then I tell him."Your garage. "
110 " I’m trying to see the magic in everyday miracles now: the fact that my heart still beats, that I can lift my feet off of the earth to walk and that there is something in me worthy of love. "
111 " Just so you know,” he mimics me, “I would chop that table up and use it for firewood before I would ever choose anything over you. "
112 " I feel like grabbing my crotch and checking to see if my balls are still there because I think they may be in her pocket and I need to get them back. "
113 " It amazes me how people are so afraid of what can happen in the dark, but they don't give a second thought about their safety during the day; as if the sun offers some sort of ultimate protection from all the evil in the world. It doesn't... Daylight won't protect you from anything, Bad things happen all the time; they don't wait until after dinner". The Sea of Tranquillity "
114 " Not my fault that you’re distractingly pretty.”I have to take a minute to confirm to the pissed off part of my brain that still works that, yes, in fact, I did just say that. And I don’t know if distractingly is even a word. If it is, it’s a stupid one. Like me. "
115 " Some things you just have to learn to live with. "
116 " I don't know how to regret it. Because that would mean to regret that I ever met her and I can't make myself do that. "
117 " I was ripped out of the water and thrown and smashed into a thousand pieces that I can't put back together. I don't know where they go. And there are so many missing that the ones that are left don't fit together anymore. I think I'll stay in pieces. I can shift them, rearrange, depending on the day, depending on what I need to be. "
118 " Everyone wants to fix me... You're supposed to be the person who doesn't want to fix me. "
119 " If self-adoration were cologne, he would be the boy you couldn't stand next to without choking. "
120 " And if I want to leave here without regrets, I need to know there are no more unsaid words left to haunt me. --Josh "