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21 " When I see clients struggling with attachment anxiety because a partner gives mixed signals or is inconsistent in their responsiveness, support or availability, it is important to explore whether or not they are expecting this partner to be an attachment figure for them. If they are, then "
― , Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy
22 " Statements that someone with a dismissive attachment style might make: "
23 " Engaging in compulsive caretaking can also become a way to prevent the discomfort of feeling lonely and enhance the perceived security of not being abandoned. "
24 " Compared to people with a more secure attachment style, people with the preoccupied style report increased jealousy and relationship conflict,24 "
25 " Research has also shown that having a secure attachment style as an adult is correlated with higher levels of relationship satisfaction and balance,12 higher levels of empathy, respect and forgiveness for partners,13 and higher levels of sexual satisfaction when compared to people who are insecurely attached in their relationships.14 Additionally, having a secure base with a partner can increase sexploration, a term coined to describe “the degree to which a person co-constructs a sex-positive, supportive, and safe environment with their partner(s). "
26 " feelings of ambivalence about their sex life, since they are less likely to use consistent contraception and more likely to engage in sex they don’t fully want.25 "
27 " higher levels of empathy, respect and forgiveness for partners,13 and higher levels of sexual satisfaction when compared to people who are insecurely attached in their relationships. "
28 " secure attachment style might make: I find it easy to make emotional connections with others. I enjoy being close with others. I am comfortable depending on others and having others depend on me. I don’t often worry about being abandoned or about someone getting too close to me. If I am in distress I can easily turn to my attachment figure for comfort and support. I am aware and accepting of my partners’ strengths and shortcomings, and I treat them with love and respect. During conflict or disagreement, I am able to take responsibility for my part, apologize when needed, clear up misunderstandings, apply problem-solving strategies and forgive when needed. I do well with the transition of going from being by myself to then being together with a partner, and I also do well with the transition of going from being together to then being alone again. "
29 " It also explains a model called HEARTS, which describes secure functioning in ways that can be applied to healing your own attachment challenges. "
30 " intensifies their focus on their partners. "