11
" Attempt 1: (Thirty seconds after crossing the bridge.) Adrian: “This place really is kind of beautiful. Like, look at this flower…” (Flower spits acid into his eyes.) Adrian: “Oh, gawd! Oh, sweet, merciful gawd! I think I’m blind!” (He promptly stumbled over a cliff before Dom could put him out of his misery.) (He screamed the entire way down.) Attempt 19: Dom: “You should stay behind me.” Adrian: “Why? Last time, nothing was on this trail. And did you see these glowing rocks—" (A panther pounced on him from a low-hanging branch.) Adrian: “Ahh! Is that my intestine? How am I even still alive?” (He somehow survived for a full minute.) (A very loud minute.) Attempt 37: (Adrian walked behind Dom, talking to himself) Adrian: “Okay, this time, I’m going to be careful. I’m going to stay behind Dom. I’m going to watch my surroundings. I’m not going to sniff the flowers. Or actually anything with bright colors. Hell, if it’s interesting enough to take a picture of it – it can definitely kill you. Ha! That’s actually pretty good… Hey Dom, I think I just invented the Photograph Rule—” (Adrian tripped over a root and bashed his head against a tree trunk.) (He then fell into a small pond where he was promptly drained dry by a swarm of leeches.) (They were bright pink.) "
― Travis Bagwell , Happy (Awake Online)
