Home > Author > Milton Berle
1 " Poverty is not a disgrace, but it's terribly inconvenient "
― Milton Berle
2 " If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door "
3 " A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. "
4 " Laughter is an instant vacation. "
5 " You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think. "
6 " Committee - a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours. "
7 " I'd rather be a 'could-be' if I cannot be an 'are' because a 'could-be' is a 'maybe' who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a 'has-been' than a 'might-have-been' by far; for a 'might-have-been' has never been, but a 'has' was once an 'are. "
8 " We owe a lot to Thomas Edison-if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight. "
9 " You don't need to travel, laughter is an instant vacation "
10 " I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods! "
11 " A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, "Did you miss a step?" "No," he answers, "I hit every one of them! "
12 " I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; for a might have-been has never been, but a has was once an are. "
13 " Jews don't drink much because it interferes with their suffering. "
14 " I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far, for a might-have-been has never been, but a has was once an are. "
15 " You can't believe everything you hear, but it's fun to repeat it anyway. "
16 " I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might have been, by far; for a might have been has never been but a has was once an are. "
17 " I’d rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I’d rather be a has-been than a might-have-been by far; for a might-have-been has never been, but a has-been was once an are. "
18 " When opportunity doesn't knock, create a door "
19 " The only place success comes before is in the dictionary "
20 " I'd rather be a 'could-be' if I cannot be an 'are', because a 'could-be' is a 'maybe' who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a 'has-been' than a 'might-have-been,' by far, for a 'might-have-been' has never been, but a 'has' was once an 'are. "
