Home > Author > Angela B. Chrysler
41 " ear. In most people, it provokes a response to run. ... I will make you cum and then I will run. That is what I was trained to do. My brain is programmed this way. My body is conditioned this way. Fear is my trigger. This is what I am. Fear. This is what I have become. This is my defense. You asked for my story. I will tell you exactly how I came to be like this. "
― Angela B. Chrysler , Broken
42 " I hated checking my voicemail. I associate it with matters of importance and nothing ever was. Such a pain. I also hated guests, change, interruptions, and the feeling I got when someone came to my door. Anxiety, terror, then the arousal. I wanted him to leave and afterward I would indulge in a bit of fantasy. "
43 " I knew where I was. It had been too long. I blinked back the image and tried to clear my head. I had to remember which world I was in. "
44 " If I were alone right now I would descend into the bowels of my mind and, this time, I wasn’t certain I could come back. There was less and less reason for me to. "
45 " The life I’ve lived, you think it’s something to admire, to aspire to? You think I hoard romanticism within my silence?”...“There are those whose lives are hell,” I said. “Hell barely begins to explain what I have lived. The books I wrote were buried beneath the endless screams. Most days, I can not write or think or breathe over the screaming in my head.”...“I want to bury this inside me,” I said. “You must understand. There is a part of me that always longs for death. There are days, it hurts too much. I can not get angry. I can never be angry. I won’t allow it. I’m afraid of what I will do if ever I get angry. "
46 " I did want to release this poison inside of me. Something longed to put it out there. I ached to be heard. I had tried so many times before. "
47 " Oh, how I longed to be heard just once. Perhaps that was why I always spoke my mind. I was tired of not being heard. "
48 " The inner-most thoughts of our psyche. Those are the words we keep secret. "
49 " Endurance teaches us one thing, if nothing else: to savor the calm after a storm. To savor the lives of those who survived. "
50 " I have a fear of relationships,” I began. “When I love, I love easy, deep, hard, strong, and long. But I can not marry. I can not live with anyone. I can not accept gifts from anyone or let anyone close enough for intimacy. "
51 " Know what I am, so when I flirt and smile and play with you, you’ll know exactly what my intentions are. ... I can not be owned or possessed. I will stray. I always stray. "
52 " Every word I speak is with the intent to relax you, to woo you, to draw you in, to make you love me, so I can weaken you, kill you, and run. That is what I am. "
53 " My smile forever glows in my eyes and I know it. Too many men have told me this. I’m lethal. "
54 " I wear my soul in my eyes. Everything in my life primed me for the next event good or bad. Every event left me in the mental state I needed to be in to enter and maintain the next stage. If something had altered at any point along the way, then maybe I stood a chance. But it didn’t. One train wreck prepared me for the next train wreck, which only prepared me for the next train wreck until I had inevitably become what I am before you. "
55 " My mother was beautiful, but insecure, and she boosted her lack of confidence with boasting and bragging. Every story was embellished. Every truth, exaggerated. The rule with my mother is simple. Believe nothing. "
56 " Electricity is loud. Did you know? When we had power outages, the peace from the forest would seep in and blanket the house in perfect, beautiful silence. "
57 " And Death it calls as the stone crow breaks. Streaks of blood malform its face.Death becomes its withered eyes and the shadows whisper, “Lies.” Excerpt from "Lies "
― Angela B. Chrysler
58 " Up there with the wind and the trees, I found me. I could slip so easily into the elements and feel them move through me. It felt like I could really fly and wanted, so badly, to jump, to try. ...There, in my glen, I was home. That is the only happiness I remember. "