164
" Xavier looked at Shane's outfit of pants, pistol, and no shirt, and then glanced up at the porch. "You sleep outside?"
Shane turned and looked through the screen door. There was no sign of Agnes or the sheets that had been tumbled there. A woman who could wake up fast and then remove evidence slightly. His kind of girl.
"Yep. I like fresh air."
Xavier nodded, his exasperation evaporating into amusement. "Right. Miss Agnes up yet?"
"I wouldn't know."
"Right." Xavier gave a lazy grin and walked around Shane. "Quite a woman, that Miss Agnes."
"Yep," Shane said, following him up the walk.
"Bit sharp-tempered, though."
"I'd call her fiery."
Xavier turned his head toward Shane and nodded amiably. "Fiery. That's good."
They walked up the path, Rhett ambling with them. Xavier trooped up the steps to the porch and spared a glance at the air mattress and Shane's T-shirt, crumpled in a ball. "Restless night, son?"
"Slept like a baby."
"I bet you did," Xavier said, and went into the kitchen. "
― Jennifer Crusie , Agnes and the Hitman (The Organization #0)
169
" Okay, here's my last word: Nobody shoots anybody tonight. We're a team now, one big happy family. We need each other. If everybody shows up here tomorrow breathing and with all working body parts, and I do mean everybody, I'll make breakfast. Anything you want. But if anybody hurts anybody else on the team, I'm going to be upset. Understand?"
Joey and Frankie looked in different directions.
"And nobody wants Agnes upset," Shane said.
Joey and Frankie nodded.
"Good." Agnes shoved her chair back. "Now let's all get some sleep. And somebody check on Garth, please."
"I'll check on the lad," Frankie said, getting up.
"You're not fucking Irish," Joey said, getting up to go with him.
"Family," Agnes said, steel in her voice.
"I can't wait for the holidays," Xavier said, and left them to their slumbers. "
― Jennifer Crusie , Agnes and the Hitman (The Organization #0)
170
" Well, that was certainly a disgusting display worthy of your father's family."
"Shut up, Ma," Lisa Livia said, her hands on her hips. "Like you weren't born in the Bronx, and the Fortunatos weren't a big step up for you. Now you listen to me. You try to move this wedding away from Two Rivers again, I'm gonna clean every skeleton out of every closet you got and make them dance, you hear me? I'll dig up everything you ever buried, including my daddy, and then I'll sink that beat-up rowboat you're living on so you'll be out in the street with nothing. Do not fuck with my kid and do not fuck with my friend, they are all the family I got, and they are off-limits to you. Understand? "
― Jennifer Crusie , Agnes and the Hitman (The Organization #0)
171
" I've got you, Agnes," Taylor said, not fazed in the slightest.
"You had me, Taylor," Agnes said. "Now you've got Brenda, you poor, doomed sap. And Joey 'The Gent' and Shane after your ass. You better go now. Your flunky is out in his van, and his feet are turning to ice while you wait. At any minute now, he's going to tear up that report and go somewhere far away until the wedding is over."
"Nah, he-"
"And Shane's coming home any minute."
Taylor looked over his shoulder. "
― Jennifer Crusie , Agnes and the Hitman (The Organization #0)
177
" I was going to complain about the noise," Lisa Livia said, still looking fragile but much better than she had before, "but now I'm just impressed. Leave it to the army to mechanize an erection."
"Laugh now, funny girl," Shane said. "That's gonna be a bridge in about a minute."
"And that bridge can hold over sixty tons," Carpenter said.
"So it's a strong erection," Lisa Livia said, looking at Carpenter.
"Oh, yes," Carpenter said, standing more erect himself. "
― Jennifer Crusie , Agnes and the Hitman (The Organization #0)
178
" He leaned on the bar. "I'm Tony. And you owe me."
Okay, here we go, Liza thought, and leaned on the bar, too, mirroring him. "I owe you?"
"Yes." He grinned at her. "Because of chaos theory."
Liza shook her head. "Chaos theory."
He moved closer to her. "Chaos theory says that complex dynamical systems become unstable because of disturbances in their environments after which a strange attractor draws the trajectory of the stress."
Liza looked at him, incredulous. "This is your line?"
"I am a complex dynamical system," Tony said.
"Not that complex," Liza said.
"And I was stable until you caused a disturbance in my environment."
"Not that stable," Liza said.
Tony grinned. "And since you're the strangest attractor in the room, I followed the trajectory of my stress right to you."
"That's not what you followed to me." Liza turned so that her back was against the bar, her shoulder blocking him. "Give me something better than that, or I'll find somebody else to amuse myself with."
From the corner of her eye, she saw the other guy, the vacant-looking blond, lean down to Bonnie. "Is she always like this?" he said to Bonnie, and Liza turned to size him up. Big. Husky. Boring.
"Well, your friend isn't exactly Prince Charming," Bonnie said, giving him her best fluttery smile.
He beamed back down at her. "Neither am I. Is that okay?"
Oh, come on, Liza thought, and caught Tony-the-bullethead's eye.
"He means it," Tony said. "Roger has no line."
"After the chaos theory debacle, that's a plus," Liza said.
"Poor baby," Bonnie was saying as she put her hand on Roger's sleeve. "Of course, that's okay. I'm Bonnie."
Roger looked down at her with naked adoration. "I'm Roger, and you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life."
Bonnie's smile widened, and she moved closer to him.
"Which doesn't mean he's bad with women," Tony said, sounding bemused. "
― Jennifer Crusie , Bet Me