Michael Ampersant QUOTES

1 " Now, if Tolstoy were still with us, he would tell us that there are basically tow types of blogs, happy family blogs, and unhappy family blogs. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

3 " Yes, we were quite satisfied. His penis is long and thin, like the dong of a chimpanzee. What can I say? Intercourse is intercourse. You want to know more? "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

5 " The person first showing up for a date is always the loser. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

7 " This would be the moment to say 'I love you', although you never know what you get back, like 'moi non plus', statistically the most honest answer (moi non plus, French, used by Serge Gainsbourg, the one and only basis for his fame, this noun phrase, meaning "me neither"), or 'I love you too', but uttered unconvincingly, or 'I love you too', uttered more convincingly, although you know it's bullshit. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

9 " Have you heard about the Knights of Malta?" I ask.
"Vaguely."
"They had a special technique, such that they would penetrate their partner, and then do nothing, just do nothing, for hours, just stay in place, frozen in time, as it were."
"And erections, did they freeze too?"
"Good question. More historical research will be needed, " I whisper. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

11 " Time for a cigarette, " he says.
"I don't smoke," I say.
"It's a poem by Tennessee Williams. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

13 " There's no way this guy could feel more for than opportunistic desire, you're just the nearest person in fucking distance tonight. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes

15 " How can one change one's ways?" he asks.

"Masturbate more, have more sex in general, be more outgoing, and love the world. "

― Michael Ampersant , Green Eyes